Now you know why Sapelsa retired early.

Ever notice how self-proclaimed “patriots” have the most un-American ideals?

Will said anchors be required to click their heels and salute at the end of each segment? The article wasn’t clear on that point.

Eli never cared for Papa John’s anyway. “Too spicy mama, too spicy” he would say when his wife would tell him to open the hanger for the airplane.

/Luck lifts a slice of pizza towards camera

Sooo, no insider trading here right? Just a complete coincidence that he sold all his stores before the chain dropped their biggest partnership, that must be nice.

I heard that, as a boss though, he can be a pain in the neck.

+4 HEAD in fact

OH GOD I HOPE THIS IS TRUE

I thought she was dating Janelle Monae?

He better leave her alone.

They never went out of style. They’re pretty timeless.

Combat boots are always in because they are an attitude.

He can only dream about Tessa Thompson

Betsy DeVoss.

I’m sure they could’ve. All they had to say was something to the effect of trying to get things back to normal and the additional publicity of her visit getting in the way of that.

Ugh, where the fuck is a bear when you need one.

Or a good ol’ Bacchanalia

Like a rejuvination of Saturnalia?

I hope to god that can be made into an actual holiday