I’m now fantasizing about a world where all jacked up body-cladded wagons are also fitted with portal axles.

This reads more like ironic, bitter Buzzfeed. Just like Gawker started as ironic, bitter celebrity gossip. I’ll allow it.

3 things: 1. Cute pic in workout gear. 2. Did you drink enough beet juice that your poop turned red (it happens and freaks people out. 3. My personal issue, but why do I hate the word “sneakers” so much? That is all.

Hah! Right?!

Never trust a man with two first names...

Nice, but I prefer the Prada-Goth spacesuits Y-3 did for Virgin Galactic crew.

i cant even imagine. what a horrible thing to be unfolding right in your backyard.

EXHILIRATING!

“I regret having to put my children through...” 

You can often spot cultists by the way they make their chattel/women dress in uniforms.

Amish thing. The wife is property, the daughter is property, the man can treat em like cattle and they have to smile. Hooray religion.

“I regret having to put my children through what they have been through this past year and wish to reconnect with my children,” Daniel Stoltzfus told the judge.

I’m trying to remember the original story.

he did an interview with 60 minutes in 2010 (i think) and this was my favorite takeaway:

I love you for making the correct comment combo choice.

It’s not legitimate MMA until Dana White awkwardly shoehorns himself into a photo with the fighters.

This would be my response too if I was his neighbor. As long as I’m living next door to a cray-cray man with a pistol who ain’t afraid to use it in broad daylight, I’m kissing his ass.

I hope our brave FIRST RESPONDER (ret.) was not injured while bravely defending our freedom!

Oh Florida.

Ah yes. He’s mad that trucks are parked in front of his property. The logical action is to render them immobile.