Oof - not feeling so good about that one, Matt.

Sigh, I get the joke and not to be that guy, but please let’s not confuse being intentionally dumb and mean spirited as the same as being intellectually disabled.

trashapple: you are a dum dum who lacks subtlety and I will not ungrey your 8 box of crayola arse. Enjoy the greys.

While I understand that the market value for NBA players has gone into the stratosphere in recent years, I can’t believe we live in a world where this sentence makes any goddamn sense:

I think when it’s a crime of this nature, it is not only acceptable, but rather should be encouraged to avoid associating yourself with that person. This wasn’t a one time thing, like that someone would be better... this was occurring over a 2 year period.

Good fucking riddance.

“Well, you see, we couldn’t throw at the other guy because it would look bad after our fans yelled racist things at him”. Baseball at its finest.  

That type of logic is a pillar of the Round-Earth conspiracy. Everyone knows that the world really works on Asteroids rules, wherein if you travel off the edge of one screen you appear from the edge of the next.

*Extremely smug early 2016 Bill Simmons voice* Yup, these are my readers.

LeBron James wears 23

That last pitch....my God. So absolutely unhittable. And sadly enough I can hear his UCL tearing as he threw it.

Poor Curt Schilling. Perhaps he thinks the government should protect his job from the invisible hand of free market forces. You know, like maybe regulators should interfere in corporate decision making... but only in this case and only for him? That’ll show the liberals.

I would bet my left arm that he initially typed “an Emmy” and then stuffed “National” in there to make it sound as fancy as it could.

Who Gat

You should parrot whatever Deadspin tells you to, don’t you?

Prosecutor: “Now Mr. Pierre-Paul, is the man who tweeted your medical records in the courtroom today?”

That’s the only check from a Schilling’s bank account that is being sent to the state of Rhode Island.

What do we have to do to make this happen on Mike & Mike?

i dont do parties. i spend me free time reading and learning about rape culture while you’re out being “a riot at parties.”