I LOVE Uncle Joe — he is far and away one of my favorite people on this planet, and not just for reasons that make for good Onion articles — but am I the only one who sat through Chris Murphy’s gun filibuster back in June and saw the parade of much younger, equally qualified candidates speak?

Meanwhile, when no one’s around, how many times a week does Donald try and call Lorne Michaels begging for another shot at hosting? Or even just a cameo? I’m guessing once/day.

Welp, that settles that I guess.

Oddly enough, I was about to go with this one on a different comment.

This is bad bad bad, but hey, at least there will be a new tweetstorm to wake up to tomorrow morning!

I hope so, if only so they come up with some new gibberish-word insults that only upset people under the age of 18. Cuck is so played...

One man’s quadruple chin is another man’s Rule 34.

I assume, at the very least, he only uses the best scotch tape. Just the most really tremendous, beautiful tape.

Yup — those wins are right around the corner. I’ve got my official Trump-branded Win Bag all ready to go to catch all of my winnings. A lifetime supply of win, so they say.

God yes. Those horribly-fitting, ready-to-wear, shiny Arsenio Hall-in-the-‘90s suits. They’re like the clothing version of his head.

Do they all really care about ethics in gaming journalism?

Is there a “hard stuff” drug that will put me into a nice, relaxing, oblivious coma for eight years? Cuz, that — I want that.

Can’t watch it. I’m not even going to pretend this guy has the slightest clue what he’s doing.

Exactly — at the end of the day, NYC is where he was born, raised and where he calls home. It must be killing him knowing that an overwhelming majority of his neighbors want him gone and to stay the fuck out.

Now now — we have to give them a chance.

Pretty sure I owe royalties to Mitch Hurwitz for the amount of times I’ve responded to “Hey! Give him a chance!” with either this gif or acting out this scene.

It’s been bouncing around Twitter for a few days now (I think this is the source)

“AND BY GOD I WILL GREEN LIGHT THAT REALITY SHOW!”

Updated:

And then this happened, which is pretty cool...