“You’re The Pun That I Want...”

HELL to the FUCK no. Crawl spaces are not for anybody who fucks living humans. You are begging to be a smiling photo on a Have You Seen Me poster with this shit.

No. I require that my partners have access to enough fridge storage for at least two onions.

It’s so specific! Does he buy the exact same things every single week, no variation? And what kind of person keeps onions in the fridge?

Maybe this is a regional dialect thing, but out here on the Left Coast a crawlspace is the area under the house, above the dirt but below the floor. What he’s in would be either an attic, a chase, or an old mechanical room, although it’s hard to determine which of those things it is from the photos.

Not gonna lie, that sounds marvellous.

I used to date a doctor - and not just a doctor, but an otorhinolaryngologist - who had a mattress on the floor in his townhouse. He kept his clothes in neatly folded piles on the floor. But what the heck, he took me to restaurants where almost everything was served flaming, and he only wanted to perform oral sex…

I’ve been profiled in the NYT.

Maybe, if Outlander or approximately Outlander-equivalent, but not IN the crawlspace.

Drunk enough to go home with a guy who lives in a crawl space but not drunk enough that you couldn’t climb up the ladder to said crawl space.

Gah! No wonder he always wears suits! At least they cover his big fat but and belly. And to think he DARES make fun of women who aren’t perfect 10's. Sheesh. He’s like a -14.

I have never seen that second one and now I am scarred for life. At what age does a woman stop sitting on her fathers lap? In tiny shorts. While looking like she’s grinding a bit?

Good thing they already have a bathtub.

It is not the nation that failed with these 2 candidates.

Since you’re already puking...

Can you imagine the collective outrage from the right if Clinton even MENTIONED that she has a vagina, let alone discuss the size or health of it?

My favorite part of the summary was when they disclosed Trump’s weight. He’s 6'2 and weighs 267 pounds. That’s morbidly obese.

“Perfectly healthy:”

I can’t believe I am saying this, but there are so many other things we can genuinely pick on Trump about, without resorting to insinuating incest overtones.

We’re all pretty much in agreement that the reason Trump hasn’t released his medical records is that he’s impotent without Viagra/Cialis, right?