Where are the chip drones I was promised? I am in my underwear and too lazy to drive half a mile.

I may just have to pop some microwave popcorn and add chip crumbs to it. #Sad #MakeAmericansChipAgain

Thought this was going to be a reference to “Possums” for a second. God that movie sucked.

My high school dropped football after declining enrollment led to a roster of 17. The team had 1 winning season in 15 years and no one came out because the team was awful.

Eh, I would caution against assuming the reason people are backing away from football. It might just be the rise of another sport, like soccer. In any case, we can’t be sure the dangers of football account for the decrease in participation at Centennial—it might just be that the team has been poop for a while.

This is fantastic news. People are actually being rational about playing a sport that is incredibly damaging to your body. Best bit of news I’ve seen today, for sure.

It’s a parochial one, attached to Our Lady of Perpetual Concussions.

Surely conscripting players into a sport they don’t want to play is almost certainly going to result in more injuries.

This is not at all accurate.

A local school near me is requiring kids who play baseball and basketball to also play football in order to spike up team numbers.

There were multiple practices. All of them had nine or fewer, but none of them had the same number of attendees. Is that pretty important to you?

That phrasing struck me as odd, too. It’s because there were multiple practices held, with attendance ranging from three to nine.

After fewer than 9 players showed up? Was it 8? 7? That number was too big to report accurately?

Yes and pedantically speaking, so are my sons schools, but they are 54 miles away from DC. Centennial, which serves Ellicott City, is Bawlmore.

The DMV ain’t LA.

Tragic. Take away sports and kids will grow up to be useless unproductive bums who lay on their couch all day commenting on Deadspin waiting for their Dominos to arrive.

Geographically, yes, but Howard County is considered part of the Washington-Baltimore-Arlington Combined Statistical Area, making a school within it, by definition, a D.C.-area high school.

Centennial is not D.C. Area, if anything it’s closer to Baltimore.