The last time I saw that many personlized handshakes Michael J. Fox was sending out Christmas cards.

this is unthinkable

After getting feedback that it came off sounding a little whiny, the executives scrapped “This Is The Meanest Canada Has Ever Been To Anybody” and changed the report’s title to “Montreal Expos Attendance Statistics.”

Canada was bound to regress to the mean sooner or later

“Bullshit.”

You’re forgetting they gave us Doug Exeter.

There’s only room for one Nick Ky___os who talks before he thinks in this country.

I adore dogs, but I recently got my first cat (I have a long commute and it wouldn’t be fair to a dog).

“GM Alex Anthopoulos is buying...”

Tom Brady killed Cecil

I had been fixated on the fact that “three planes to London” included the return trip, but yes, this too.

They can’t all be keyboard finger strength champions like you.

While Roca did take the video above, his voiceover comes from a recording he made while reading over the Giants’ 2015 roster.

Remember, kids: when it doubt, “ableism” means “that thing I don’t like that I want to shout at someone for.”

It’s you..! YOU think that.....!!!! Pinkham’s Law everyone!! Ding ding ding

Let me explain some simple physics to you, friend.

are you fucking kidding me with this comment

CHECK YOUR CHEESE PRIVILEGE

Yeah, I’m going with Swiss cheese girl too. “She was JUST ASKING!! How HARD would it have been for the server to just ANSWER?! NOT EVERYONE KNOWS DIFFERENT TYPES OF CHEESES ARE CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE GAWD”