I think there are two types of people who get pumped for this game: The hardcore “This game means so much because of the military!!!!!!!!11!1!” types, and hardcore football nerds. I’m in the latter category. Two option heavy/mostly run-based teams usually means low-scores, which doesn’t appeal to your casual to…

Oh lord I have no idea. I’m not from Chicago, and this was after a long afternoon of wedding drinking. I think we were somewhere on the North side, but I couldn’t tell you the specific neighborhood or bar.

Gonna shine like a sunbeam 

Was...was that...the SOUND of it crunching in half? It sounded like snapping several stalks of celery in half

Claudio!!!!!!! I didn’t know his name...just knew him as “The Tamale Guy”. I was in Chicago 5 or 6 years ago and he appeared at the bar around 1am with his red cooler. It was like manna from heaven to my drunken out of town self.

“Anxiety or harm”?

Man...this is the truth. Best friend from elementary/high school bought a house nearby with his girlfriend. They don’t have kids. So he comes to all my kids’ games and we drink beer (they sell it at the ball fields), or the boys and I go to his house to swim and cookout. Otherwise we’d never get to hang out and do…

How much of the sustained success of the Patriots (and, by extension, lack of success by Belichick’s assistants as head coaches) can be explained by Robert Kraft and the management structure of the Patriots? I’m sure it helps when the head coach is the de facto general manager, and doesn’t have to battle front office…

It’s because with ground meat, there’s a greater chance of introducing bacteria during the grinding process.

That makes sense. The area I live is heavily German Catholic, and I enjoy putting salt in my beer. Any draft beer I order gets a few shakes. The funny things is I never knew why I did it, beyond “every old man I knew when I was a kid did it so now I do it”. I gotta say...it does make a Stag or Miller Lite taste…

“Erik Stratton, Rush Chariman. Damn glad to meet you.”

One summer in high school I worked for a local trucking company that would clean up semi wrecks. The worst was a trailer with frozen chickens. Several thousand frozen chickens quickly thawing in the 100+ degree July heat. I thought my boss was joking when he told me to wear clothes I wouldn’t mind throwing away...

I dunno, man. I don’t think finding small cities to start new minor league teams would be a problem. According to Wikipedia, that bastion of on-line factual facts, there are currently EIGHT different independent baseball leagues in the US and one in Canada, with another 4 team league starting play next year. Of all…

Kind of tangential to your point, but what’s interesting about the large size of “Cardinals Nation” is that it’s due to KMOX having such a powerful signal, and that when atmospheric conditions were right people could hear cardinals games 100s, even 1000s, of miles away from St. Louis. That, combined with the fact that…

I think that “whooshing” sound it the joke flying over your head...

Driving 8ish hours to see family, trying to make it all in one day. My then-wife yells at my 2 year old for dumping his chocolate milk into my 7 month old’s car seat.

Wheel, snipe, celly

I looked it up...even better...this is from a protest at the Boeing missile plant, and the erudite man in question was a part of pro-war counter protesters who showed up to oppose the anti-war faction

Man...I want to like you because your username reminds me of Letterkenny, but you’re WAY into the St. Louis kool-aid. I’ve lived in the St. Louis area almost my whole life and this is a woefully bad take.

Found the Cards fan. You must be new to Deadspin