The people who love you- and have known you for many years or all your life- will not necessarily be fair in their perceptions of your relationship. They may never *see* the person you are so in love with. But. They may well see the whole situation better than you- you, after all, are participating. The bride needs to…

So true. And then, as in the letter above, they’re both angry at you.

Yes. Thank you.

Apparently Trump’s grandfather was expelled from Germany for avoiding military service/taxpaying. Four generations in the US, no military service of any kind. I mention it only cause sometimes those countries...they don’t send their best.

He def feels he is living the dream.

Just one of the many ways Trump feels he is Special.

“Underwater births in the Black Sea have been done for some 30 years and have shown that the children born in the water with the dolphins develop 6 months faster over their first six months, have perhaps 150 grams more brain weight and are ambidextrous.” More developmentally advanced than parents that would do this?…

Telling you to go somewhere else, perhaps?

There are people in the world who want to blame others for their own unhappiness and failures, blame them so that no matter how rotten they themselves behave, they can pretend that they are “nice”. Tell the FBI you are receiving threats, if that is what is happening.

My husband has...fairly often, in the past few years. He travels for work, and a man began screaming racial epithets at him on public transportation. In Sweden, or Finland, I forget which. Episodes on the street. His father’s side is Jewish, from Austria/Hungary, and apart from the ones who had already emigrated to…

We got married in Hawaii, on the beach in Lanikai. So, we rolled the ceremony and honeymoon together. My dress was a cream linen knee length, my husband wore linen jeans, and a simple shirt. The Reverend we found online, and he picked up the beach permit for us. (375.00 total). We had beautiful flower leis (20. to 40.…

Wow, that’s pretty scary. I’m torn here...you probably have to be blunt, as in “You were messaging me all the time and that freaked me out. I’m not shopping for a best friend, or a boyfriend, I was looking to play board games only.” And that might not work, because you want him to stop staring at you, messaging you,…

Macbeth, aka “the Scottish play”, or Richard III, for musings on power and politics

It’s a new place...your increased wariness is survival hardwiring. It will probably get better after you have many safe places in your new location...but why not take the time to help yourself by taking a self defense class? That will give that wary energy a positive place to flow to. You don’t have to take a lot of…

It’s *not* your fault your husband is treating you like a doormat. But...stop fulfilling his need for presents in exactly the way he wants in the vain hope that your needs will be met. Don’t do it. Buy yourself presents, and give yourself love. And the next time he hands you a list? Throw it away in front of him. When…

Just spitballing here...but probably not the only ridiculous thing Hynde says in her book. I think I’ll pass on reading it.

Too right! I worked in rape relief in the 1970’s.

My grandmother told me that people are good with money, or they aren’t- and not much will change that. I thought she was really harsh at the time, but now I realize that people who fundamentally do not handle money well just don’t get it. So marry him, if he’s great in other ways- but you handle the money.

Yes to this. Kids show some interest in “helping” with chores at an early age- 18 months or so. Let them help do things, explain patiently. Give them things to do. Sure, it’s easier to just do it yourself, but that’s short sighted- let them help and one day you’ll have teenagers who aren’t living in an area you need a…

Learn to drive. Preferably in a car with nice safety features and an automatic transmission, as that really does make it easier. It is *not* that hard, pretty much anyone can do it.