Ahem the originator:

She was really just there for the cake. Because human, dog, cat, Donkey, insect, or pregnant reptile, everyone loves cake.

Tori doesn't sound upset because she ventured into kinky waters for Dean. She sounds upset because he's making it sound like she wasn't a sexually fulfilling partner. Cheaters often like to focus on stupid stuff ("We didn't have sex the night before I left for my job") as an excuse for their behavior - see, Tori made…

Hey now, as someone who went to grad school to become and arts critic with many other talented, kind aspiring critics — don't lump us altogether with such lazy stereotyping. My professors, many of whom have won Pulitzer Prizes for their criticism, would be horrified if any of us turned in a piece that went for the…

More proof that being a critic is nothing more than a made-up profession for unskilled people to be able to make money by being mean.

Exactly. Like wild swans and wild geese and any number of other animals you shouldn't let little Jimmy try and go up to pet. Wild animals are wild effing animals.

I dated a guy who grew up in Montana, and he said it wasn't an uncommon sight to see tourists try and put their children on the backs of live moose for a photo op. SEE, PEOPLE? MOOSE ARE NOT NICE.

Reminds me of HGTV, when everyone complains about a home they're viewing having "popcorn ceilings." Popcorn nails?

You're half right. MATTE textures (no glittah!) are gross. Textures with glitter are beautiful and easier to remove than classic glitter polishes. Exhibit A (my nails!):

And then file your nails with...your nails.

I first read this article in 1982.

That is the fugliest effing manicure I've ever seen.

That shit is so Florida.

Lord knows I've always wanted to fingerblast myself with a pint or two of Rust-Oleum Deck Restore.

Textured nails look like pick-up truck bedliner. On the plus side, I can bedline your finger nails and offer a five year warranty.

i'm obviously an Old and a fuddy-duddy because i hate 99% of all 'nail art' and think it looks ridiculous at best, tacky and vulgar at its worst. i'm also sick of the giant, square acrylic nail trend with the super white tips that makes everyone's nails look like giant shovels. and don't get me started on french…

I went to Notre Dame :-/

Or anywhere in the fine state of Indiana, apparently.

He should be honored to be called a cunt. I vote for Poop. He is a piece of Poop. I hate this Poop man.

I think we could all use a hedgehog in an egg cup.