*raises a nervous hand

Oh I’m not saying BMW hasn’t been successful over the last twenty years. They were wise to get in on the luxury SUV market pretty early on, and those things are cash machines in America, no matter how ugly. I think the first gen X5 looks good but the first gen X3 looks like an old shoe and people gobbled them up. They…

Thank you for sharing!

Oh their reputation for design has been going downhill since Bangle and van Hooydonk spawned the e65. It may have leveled out at some point but it has never gone back up. 

There it is

The only way to explain that 260z is that someone filthy rich went on a years long bender while getting work done it. I picture them finally come to one day and stumbling into their garage to find this thing then desperately trying to decipher what happened to their Z. Might be a good sequel to Momento. 

Sounds like most of my high school buddies. I’m super short, like 5’4” and they’re all 6’2” and up. They were in my wedding and the photos are hilarious.

Is your son Hagrid, gamekeeper and keeper of keys at Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry?

McCarthy is just bitter

Data looked pretty smokin though.

Okay, umm, how about this: Adam Sandler is in love with a girl, but umm it turns out she’s a golden retriever or something.

Penis puppetry. That’s quality entertainment right there. My personal favorite is the “wrist watch”. Wonder how hard it is to get clown paint out of vinyl seats…

Put donut spares on all four corners and I think we have ourselves a deal!

What’s up with the Mercedes G class in the background? It still has the pre-delivery plastic on the doors. I only ever see that on cars being driven from the docks to the dealership. Either this guy talked a dealership into selling him a car that had no delivery prep performed or his scheme is beyond just a Joe Schmo…

But won’t someone think of the crackle exhaust bros?

Whoa whoa whoa. Porn clown? You have to elaborate.

I’ve never seen what a slideshow looks like on the desktop, but on mobile it looks exactly the same as a regular article. 

In his honor, here are a few of my favorite GIFs:

I have the distinct feeling that even the constituents that keep voting for him also hate him but keeping him in office somehow owns the libs. You know, the classic cutting off of noses for spite purposes and what have you.