#notallwomenontheinternethavestinkypussy’s

I came here for that joke and was not disappointed.

So Mitt’s binders finally came in handy?

Amy Schumer left a big tip?! That means she can make like 100 more nigger jokes now.

I just want to say that you’re my hero and in my opinion you absolutely did the right thing. I don’t know if I missed this last week or something (it kind of sounds like you’ve talked about it before and I usually don’t do SNS) but you’re awesome. Normally I am totally in the “leave the animals alone no matter how…

Everyone is up to date on shots, including distemper, and we did our best to keep everything as separate as possible, but never ever again. Ever.

I was going to suggest Bradley Cooner, but as usual your superior wit has bested me and Dean Coontz would have been perfect.

That’s awesome advice. Thankfully Matthew’s widdle toofs weren’t fully erupted yet and he was too weak and hungry to really even put up a fight when I pulled him out of the garbage bag (I don’t even want to know how that happened...) Also- I was wearing old winter mitts from my emergency trunk kit BECAUSE I’M THE…

I was all gung-fucking-ho on driving him all the way up to Sault Ste. Marie at one point (nope, full up there too.) It worked out well, two hours north and we can get progress updates and photos.

Sure. But for someone like Angelina Jolie, who has really done a lot of actual work, including writing and directing a film about Bosnia, it doesn’t make a lot of sense.

I was going to post “cue someone for snarking on a celebrity for trying to do a good thing, even when they, unlike most celebrities, take the time to educate themselves about their pet issue and devote serious time and effort to it.”

I’ve been joking with people about this crazy exotic cat baby I found. Like “must be an expensive Siamese type unit.”

I will forever love Angelina Jolie just for her repeat visits to Syrian refugee camps. They are low key. It’s never about her. The refugees that I’ve heard from appreciate it, and appreciate the attention that comes along with it. They need every bit of help possible, and will take it where they can, bc for the most…

The media couldn’t give two shakes about summits like this. (How often do these sort of summit meeting making it on Jezebel alone? Anyone?) But add an A list star and now you have a story. It’s sad but true. And Jolie knows this. If she is anything, she is media savvy. So, good for her for manipulating the media into…

That’s her on the left

Yeah...puckering is what my dog’s asshole does when he’s about to poop and holding off till the last second to find that perfect patch of grass. If my nipples did that when touched, I’d be extremely concerned.

Actually, that sounds terrible. Whatever beef they don’t sell on Monday will probably have to be thrown out, cause it will spoil before next Monday. We’d have to switch to all frozen foods or something to make that work. And then we’ll be paying for aisle after aisle of freezers full of stuff we can’t buy cause it’s…

I really hope this thread can stay civil. Tattoos are not for everyone and if you don't like them, don't get one, etc.