And mention it's your birthday to the bartender. If he/she's not a complete asshole it's an almost guaranteed free drink.

I feel you. My 30th birthday party was the day I decided to never throw a party for anything, ever again.

Trump bragging about how his tax returns are bigger than everybody else's tax returns is pure gold.

Presidents are so selfish. I saw Jimmy Carter in an airport once, and he wouldn't even co-sign my bank loan.

In that it tastes like craft paste.

Or giving us too much credit.

Random nonsense, thrown together for an undiscriminating audience by people who didn’t give a damn.

A master piece, indeed.

I'll have the McFiwjfiohyseyuhfehlsurieyychuefen.

I like those Lincoln commercials.

Isn't that the Trump/Pence platform?

By the end I was reading this in the voice of the guy in Blade Runner who announces snake lady, "vatch her take zee pleasures of zee serpent zat once corrupted man…"

I read the headline as Pegging Jeff Goldblum. I want my money back.

Can't wait to read about this on the Bob Loblaw Law Blog.

I'd actually prefer if they boycotted more things. Maybe at some point they'll just stop leaving their houses and we'll never have to look at or hear from them ever again.

I stand by my decision.

I've got an Aryan V right h—you know what, never mind.

It's almost a certainty he'll die in a plane/helicopter crash some day. Growing up in the mountains, those things go down in the backcountry all the damn time.

Upper torso.

Who's more foodle-ish, the foodle, or the foodle who follows him?