That’s so funny! My mom packed the whitest whitey food ever because she hated all spices and refused to buy any produce more exotic than potatoes or tomatoes. I was super jealous of everyone else’s lunches

(in the Norm Macdonald playing Burt Reynolds SNL Celebrity Jeopardy cadence)

It’s OK to lose to Lindy West. She’s smart and funny and kind and knows how to use the caps lock button when making a point or a joke unlike 90% of either humanity or the internet.

Slick Pence, Trump the bitchier

No, I love candy corn don’t do this.

This is awesome.

Jesus. How far down the rabbit hole are you when you begrudge feeding children wholesome food? I never liked Bush but if he had gotten fruit and vegetables to needy kids in schools, I would have admitted he’d done a good thing.

And it’s a bit ironic too, isn’t it. Because call her corrupt, or dishonest, or mercenary, but Clinton is actually pretty damned tough, and smart, and sane. Meaning, even if you believe what her detractors say about her, so what??? She’ll compromise with Republicans, keep the economy running, not try to stifle…

...I actually quite loved the wedding episode. One of my favorites actually, but I admit to being a sap so that probably helped.

Oh Waka Flocka, solidarity. It happened to me twice. Once when I was a teen, at Belgrade Airport, in 1993, just before the war. We were detained by Serbian Border police for 15 hours, and me and my siblings were playing chess with a bunch of older Bosnian men who were detained with us. One of the men, with this brown…

Rant: I never thought I would say this considering its Kim K, but I don’t think this was faked for “attention whoring”. Say what you will about her but my gut tells me this isn’t the kind of shit she’d lie about fur attention. Robberies DO happen, and when you consider someone of her wealth this is a reality that has…

Okay, assuming she was uncomfortable and awkward in that situation...isn’t that the point? Wealthy white people SHOULD be uncomfortable and awkward about minority poverty.

Well, he’s stupid enough to do it and think it would show that he’s “legitimately” paying no taxes, but would his ego allow him to show that he’d lost that much money in a single year? That would undermine his “businessman” cred.

Agreed.

Would you also hire an electrician to fix your plumbing? Prefer someone who’d never performed surgery to do your triple bypass?

We all know nothing he does will ever shake his core supporters. Who gets shaken are the morons who flipped from him to Hillary after the DNC, then back to him when they thought Hillary was dying, then back to Hillary after the debate. This helps keep those paragons of intellect in Hillary’s corner.

When asked to contribute something, Trump said “Tiffany? That sweetpiece bartender down at...what’s that place? No? Oh Tiffany. Marla’s kid, yeah. Nice kid. Sure, I’ll say something nice. Remind me later.”

They only magically replaced if you live in Oregon I guess...

“Bud Pierce has died of dysentery”

I miss the good old days when presidents just threw up on people.