This is comic gold with commentary from the pro ass shaker, sorry hit so close to home, but this f'n hilarious shit. Get the stick out of your ass and enjoy the humor, we all say and do stupid shit, even with the best intentions.

I never threatened in any way, but I was the mom that wanted her to try on 2 dresses I liked. She liked them fine and looked cute in them, but didn't light up like she did with THE dress.

I bought my wedding dress in a city where none of my friends or relatives lived because we had just moved when we decided to get married. I went shopping alone. I thought it was going to be sad but it was nice, I could really chose what I liked the most. When I was trying on my favorite dress the mother of another…

My other thought is, if she had access to affordable day care, maybe she would have gotten away from that sick bastard more easily as well.

"But I wanna say that my wife has dated broke black dudes. It got nothing to do with the money."

When Lilo photoshops her photos, Jez makes fun of her. When Beyonce does it, she either had nothing to do with it, or she is a victim to the pressures on women to be perfect, or there's no certainty the obvious photoshop is really a photoshop.

"Certainly you cannot require that EVERY employer provide paid maternity leave..."

It's a liability issue. Many chapters have to fill out crazy paperwork for these events before they can happen. Social events with alcohol, social events without alcohol, philanthropy events, etc. all have different forms you have to fill out to be approved by the inter/national office. Among other things, how sisters…

Not at the expense of using someone else's body to do it. Unless you support forced organ donation, too. Do you really consider it moral to force a woman to carry a doomed fetus?

There's no medical test for autism. The diagnosis is based on behavior and cognitive development. Usually when the child is a toddler.

If the difference between terminating an anencephalic fetus at 21 weeks and euthanizing a senior citizen escapes you, I'm genuinely concerned for your ability to take care of yourself.

They actually do get into a lot of trouble when these posts go viral, and can result in them being put into probation, all the way to being removed from their campus.

If Republicans ever have enough political power to ban abortion, they will have almost certainly eliminated government assistance programs, too, so...

Excuse me, but Ke$ha (I will not stop using the $) has a song called "Dinosaur." So it's completely legal.

I'm actual plus size and I use Spanx. I like them a lot. They are my most favorite brand of tights. They go up to plus size sizes too, they just don't say "plus size" anywhere on them. These ones are my favs, sizes D+ are arguably plus sized.

He actually can't say that right now. The church is still choked with a conservative element that will pillory him if he goes too far to the left. In terms of being a catholic, what he is saying is revolutionary and the rest will have to follow. The most important thing he talked about is avoiding ideological…

You had an RSVP? Like they invited you to lunch and you confirmed via mail or email? That's weird. Do restaurants usually send you invites? If so, they should stop.

She came out about this publicly a decade ago, admits she had a consensual relationship with him when they were both married, and says he drugged and raped her on the night she came to see him to end the relationship?

while his parents defend him as a good kid "who's made some mistakes."

OMG Melbourne was incredible. The clothes, the makeup, the accents. A masterpiece.