This is the hottest take ever. Forget sportswriters Drew, just email this guy every week for your material. I want to have a viewing party to watch you spill your “honorable” tough-guy “you don’t know what it’s like to work so hard” tears, preferably in ultra HD. I want the St Louis Cards to hire you as their lead…

Tom Brady is responsible for 500 Days of Kristin.

Tom Brady gave those women quaaludes and then had sex with them.

Tom Brady killed Cecil

*Rider* but yeah semantic. Just don’t be an asshole on the road in general, regardless of transportation mode. Being an ass in a car gets you yelled at, worst your car is damaged. Being an ass on a motorcycle can get you killed and also brings down the entire community. Ditto for cyclists, but you probably will get…

And we have our winner! Congratulations, you win the White Tears Award for the 21st of July, 2015. Competition was stiff, but you truly went to the next level. Enjoy your box of tissues.

I’m trying to find the part where they answered the question.

Lebron’s 4-2 record tops Jordan’s 0-6 record. GOAT

Hold my contract, I’m going in!

Sometimes, an NFL team gives a player and contract, and then doesn’t honor it.

...is to have approximately $180?

As a lawyer, it’s insulting that that’s how you think class actions work. Such a lopsided payout would never happen. The lawyers would get 73 million, and the plaintiffs would get $9.95 off of their next pay-per-view.

Oh, Thugga’s got bricks. Belie’ dat.

So a play on words is racist?

Well my wife, who is also from the Baltics thought a potato was a steak.

Well Russians also consider, for instance, the western press to be the pinnacle of propaganda. And Ukraine to be an aggressor. And Iran to be a force for stability in the Middle East. In short, when Russia considers you to be something, you can pretty much rest assured you’re not that. Go ahead on with your bad self,…

“Playoff hockey is the best sports postseason there is.”

Have faith, friend. The Wild and Blues are evenly matched except for goaltending, where Dubnyk > Allen and Elliot. They can do this.

On what basis do the Wild’s chances not look good? Their other-worldly goaltending? Their super balanced roster? Top flight Penalty Kill? That they rattled off 12 straight road wins, an NHL record, and an important factor for the playoffs? The fact they split the season series?

Playoff hockey is the best sports postseason there is.