True that! We especially don’t owe ppl proven to be toxic anything, W/ the notable exception of an occasional ....”just ASK me how many fucks I don’t give” to them!!

Nothing quite like the mental\emotional stress of a dysfunctional family and all the “holiday cheer”. Coming from such a family, I feel you. I found that I had no choice but to pretty much cut them loose. You’re dealing with so much more.

Families are the TRUE succubuses (succubii ?) from hell! You deserve a decent life! Do NOT be guilt-tripped because you are “blood”! Disengage from these alleged ppl ASAP, for your own health AND sanity!

Good for you. What you described is so toxic and so abusive but what you are doing about it is very smart, courageous, and life-affirming. Have a wonderful journey, find your peace and then evaluate how much you are willing to take on.

you've been handing out some really excellent love and advice tonight.

you take that fucking break, bb. take it for the rest of your life if you need to. those lecherous people have demonstrated so many times over that they don't deserve you. so many hugs.

Also, I don’t know if you’ve already left or are still figuring out where to go, but I highly, highly recommend the Ojai Valley Inn and Spa if you want to super-relax. I went there by myself this spring (the first vacation I ever took alone!) and just totally mentally reset. Let me know if you end up going out there…

I was depressed and suicidal when I was living in LA and had no one to take care of but myself and my cat. I had a handful of friends, but not the support network I really needed. I GTFO out of there almost three years ago and while the last three years haven’t been perfect, I also haven’t thought about just…

I view behavior by my family this way: If a stranger did this to me, how would I feel/react?

I’ve done that too. I’m harder on myself than anyone else has ever been. I’m not sure how to stop either so I learned to praise myself for the little things I do right. Wasn’t feeling up to a workout but did half of one anyway? Hey good job Supernova! Got that report to the boss a week before the due date? Great! You…

My god, that sounds exhausting. I hope wherever you end up that you find peace and have wonderful experiences along the way.

You should be proud of yourself. You are setting a boundary with people that seem to have made trampling your boundaries a sport. They are unhealthy and they are not your responsibility in the way that they expect you to be. Your job is to love yourself, be gentle with yourself, get some therapy to help you get…

Go and don’t look back. Let the dad take care of his kid. Put your mom in a home if need be. There are some nice ones that are more like spas. Take care of yourself. No one else will. You deserve to be happy.

Hahaha now I’m imagining it and I think it would be an awesome adventure. Just remember to not let me eat after midnight. ;)

GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!

I’ll help you pack. I’m sorry you’re going through this and I’m rooting for you.

Your decisions seem quite reasonable. Nobody is being abandoned, everyone has the chance to get out of a toxic environment and heal themselves. Keep going. I hope that with space and distance kid will start to come around.

Your situation sounds super tough. I hope that you can regroup and recharge your batteries. It sounds like you are doing what is right for you - after extending a huge amount of energy and resources caring for two people who don’t reciprocate much.

I really hope that by the time I’m reading this, you’re in the wind (or at least poised for flight). It’s partly that you can’t be there without taking care of yourself (the airplane/airmask scenario), but also because selfish isn’t a bad thing. At the end of the day, who deserves to be treated better by you than you?