Ugh, you are so right! Taking them out would be a whole extra set of time-sucking. Those braids are fine and long, so even if she cut them to the length (unless it was only an inch long, which I doubt) of her real hair to start the unbraiding process, fingers would still cramp like a lobster. And she would have had to…

This actually shut me up for a second. The parted ‘fro has me feeling emotions I don't quite recognize. So much confusion...

Now you’ve got me thinking about how much money she’s spent keeping up this look. General upkeep couldn’t have been cheap in the least.

Last post, but her hair con was ridiculously perfect as most that would question the “reallness” of her hair, wouldn’t dare lay a finger on her ‘fro. Those in my life know my hard and fast rule- “never touch my hair, ESPECIALLY when I just got it done.” CHECK. MATE.

As terrible as this all is......who ever publishes her eventual book on this mess, will be rich FOREVER. Heck, her spokesperson/agent(you know she’ll get one), will probably be able to retire on this “Golden (or should I say “light brown?”) Goose.”

Shit.....maybe she should get my “black” card, because I don’t have that type of dedication to my hair game. AT. ALL. For a while, Ive really wanted to get box braids, but my life has no time to spare for all the hours needed to get that done. Don’t care how “fast” the hands are, I cannot sit in a chair that long. In…

I’m not much darker than the woman here and my family’s features, complexions and hair textures/colors are all over the place. Seriously, it’s like a “Shake & Bake” of genes. I wouldn’t have questioned her being black or her “blackness” if I met her(because that is just straight up weird), but I would’ve been curious…

Would the majority of these tweets be easier to understand if I actually had a Twitter account? With the exception of Aziz (never heard “U Mad”) , Mara and Zach Braff(just...,,ugh) the rest remind me of a 1,000piece puzzle of a garden(things I recognize, but no clue where to put them).

Not childish and completely necessary. Had the same type of mother and I try to celebrate the day she “wishes I was never born(her words, when I was 8)“

I do a gathering of friends, but mainly I ask my family to play nice for ONE FUCKING DAY. I too take care of everyone and I just want one day that I can have people treat me kindly.

Same for me. My mom didn’t like to bothered(no cake and no birthday wishes in my house)by all that birthday “nonsense” growing up, that I overcompensate a bit now in adulthood. I just ask my friends to eat and drink with me, while I wear something I think makes me look nice. No presents at all and I make the plans, so…

Bourbon it is.

Your comments have made my day. It’s like you know my brain. One day, one day I will meet you (preferably not on a train, but especially not on the F,G or 7) and I will bribe you to be my friend with vodka.

I have my top fears organized in a “makes sense to me and only me” kind of way. By group and then rated by scariest. In the “Subway, Lawd That’s A Lot of Pain” category, my top three are:

The last line made me laugh so hard I spit out some of my s'mores Pop Tart. I must now go search for it, unless I want ants for the summer.

Tears of laughter are actually streaming down my face. Thank you.

Part of me hopes that this gets buried under all of the “good” posts. It’s early Sunday morning and I’d rather be on Jezebel. As strange as it may sound, being here brings me comfort. Right now, comfort is what I need. Long post, feel free to skip entirely, I just needed to put my words out there.

Since I didn’t see the first Magic Mike movie, I wasnt sure what to expect of this trailer beyond the usual beefcake/cheese fest. I regret to say my level of secondhand embarrassment is at an all time high because of the following:

I only have myself to blame. At 32, I got 24, 23 and 27 for the first three pics. I decided to ever myself another “boost” and roll the dice one more time....I got 54. No more for me.

You figured me out. All of that sounds amazing(esp. The Dali Museum) and makes me seriously reconsider adding a detour on my trip to see family in Florida next month.