Yeah, my dad is now over 65, so he has to go back in every couple of years. But my cousin got her license when she was 26 and had the same one until she left earlier this year at 40. CRAZY.

Arizona licenses also don’t expire for like 40 or 60 years or something, as I learned when my friend showed me hers, which is AWESOME AS HELL but also kind of bizarre.

I am an idiot. He had actually spelled it “Worcester,” and somehow—I have no idea why—I corrected it to a wrong spelling. I’ve seen that name a hundred times, I know how it’s pronounced, I’ve BEEN there before, ffs. I have no idea what the hell happened when I was editing that story.

We always used Arizona licenses for fake IDs in college because they don’t expire until you’re 65 and they didn’t have holograms at the time. The upperclassmen would just pass them along to a younger buddy as soon as they turned 21 and no longer needed it. I sometimes wonder if my old fake is still in circulation.…

This is already the case for Arizona ID cards as my mom has found out the hard way. The governor refuses to let “Big Government” dictate how he runs his state, so now my mom has to fly on her passport within the country. Crazy.

“Dear Ask A Clean Person:

We have two cats who are very small by daytime. At night, they somehow expand in size to take up a whole king-sized bed. Seriously. There is no way of lying down without being poked by a cat doing an impression of a sleeping starfish.

The soundtrack introduced me to Iron & Wine (via The Postal Service), and for that I will always be grateful.

I don’t want Natalie Portman to feel bad, I want Zach Braff to feel bad.

I unabashedly love the Garden State soundtrack, and I will not apologize for that.

I HAVE, and the only thing worse I’ve had in that category was an unripe persimmon. Which was like trying to eat a sock dipped in battery acid.

Why is it that memes are mostly done by people who can’t spell?

That is the single funniest SNL sketch, ever.

I LOVE THIS WOMAN SO MUCH.

Now that's a legacy right there.

YES. She must be tight with Tina and Amy. So she has my dream friends on top of a banging career and being hilarious. Keep on killing it, Paula Pell.

Wait....is that Pete Hornberger’s wife!? How did I not realize her secret greatness!?

she also wrote the colonel angus sketch. NEVER FORGET.

I have literally found massive caterpillars in the corners of my house that were less scary than Kylie’s eyelashes.