Alas, I fear she is destined to be like those people in the 90s who went around saying, "No, that's not irony."

Once upon a time, a long time ago, I was in a video store (look it up) when a customer, knowing it was an odd request, asked the clerks to recommend a movie that would introduce children to the idea of kidnapping.

I doubt they'll have a permanent record, although it depends on whether there's a mandatory sentence for whatever they wind up charged with. I would expect a deal where they complete probation and then the charges are expunged. Which means that if asked if they were ever arrested or convicted of a crime, they can…

"Oh, there's nothing to do here, I'm forced to get hammered for fun." I never had a problem finding ways to amuse myself without drinking. But then, I never thought that getting hammered would be fun.

If you haul out the big dress and the pageantry, I don't care how you word it in your press release, I'm assuming you're doing it for the princess fantasy. If you don't have a princess fantasy, don't act one out.

"ISIS. Climate Change. Income Inequality. Curls."

I'm a little cranky about Cory Booker getting "weak tea" because he said no to the presidency. I wouldn't want to be president, either. Not to mention, it hasn't been all fun and games for Obama (who I think will be treated well by history, at least).

'Usually the same guys who call it "babysitting" when they're asked to take care of their own children.' RAGE-INDUCING!

The woman who asked nicely for help pronouncing "spaghetti" got a kind answer from her server. The woman who was insulting about the "bread rolls" — who had supposedly eaten them before but failed to detect any non-bread elements — hasn't earned any kindness.

My theory: Maru is the incarnation of the Buddha.

"I never said anything about a funeral." Because only your words can influence whatever point I care to make.

The argument being made is that a funeral is somehow necessary for "closure." In my experience, it is not. Also, I suspect that you are being too general about what my brain can or cannot possibly resolve.

I have, in fact, lost both my parents, and I really don't get the "closure" argument. She's gone. A funeral doesn't change that. A funeral doesn't say, "Okay, you can start being sad now." A funeral doesn't say, "Okay, you can start getting on with your life again." My father died and was cremated in January; we…

The protest regards the way the university treats their students who were raped and their students who were accused of rape. University policy is, pretty much by definition, the responsibility of the university. It is true that the university is not responsible for responding to rapes of people who are not their…

So the only crimes that really matter are the ones which are most numerous? If not, then what exactly is your point? Other than misplaced pedantry?

"Prevalence Up, Reporting Down." Other way around, no?

Grothman should stop sucking on the government teat and get a real job...

Something about this nay-saying doesn't feel right. I bet they're just doing it for attention. Click baiters.

My somewhat outdated Betty Crocker cookbook has a recipe for Cincinnati chili, which is to take the chili recipe and put it on top of spaghetti. I couldn't figure out why you wouldn't just make spaghetti sauce.

Who's to say Lammily can't be an action figure instead of a doll?