cheetosfan

6/19/14

This is why I can't get into my MLS team. It's not even the stuff fans yell at other teams, but our own team. One misfired pass, and then some drunk jackoff yells "fuuuuck YOU NUMBER 11" for 90 more minutes. But I make lemons out of lemonade, so I'm turning it into a drinking game and taking a shot every time someone…

6/19/14

So, you said your wedding was the best day of your life. What's your wife up to these days?

6/19/14

Your problem isn't that you're ugly, it's that you're a passive-aggressive, condescending dillhole. You keep telling yourself whatever you need to justify why women don't like you, dude. What about dudes? Why don't they like you? Too busy getting pussy to care about a nerd like you?

6/19/14

Two decades ago, kids could sit in the front seat because there were no airbags. Now, kids sit in the rear where they can't be seen. Here's my young lady rant: quit the knee-jerk reaction you have to blame my generation for a problems yours would have had too. And quit taking a chunk of my paycheck, while you're at…

6/19/14

"Humans, Hickling said, have a fundamental need to create and maintain a narrative for their lives in which the universe is not implacable and heartless, that terrible things do not happen at random, and that catastrophe can be avoided if you are vigilant and responsible.

6/19/14

This is the most gut-wrenching thing I've read in a long time. Ugh.

6/19/14

The other day I put the spinach in the cupboard. It seemed absolutely impossible to me, because I never fuck up like that, I'm not slipping into early Alzheimer's, there is no trend. But it makes it ever, so slightly possible that I could make a big fuck up some time.

6/19/14

Erin Gloria Ryan used to be commenter Morningloria. She was as wickedly funny then as she is now. So, lowly commenter, your dreams can come true too!

6/19/14

I tried a gluten-free diet for a couple weeks and it's crazy how quickly you can fall down the internet hole with that stuff. There is just so much "support" out there, even if you're just browsing some forums (I swear I didn't comment) and it's so tempting to want to find a theory of everything that is wrong with…

6/18/14

Why?

6/18/14

I had the same reaction regarding the unusual relationships. When it was just the "friend" for whom she was giving free childcare, I thought maybe I was being culturally insensitive, and that some communities are more informal when it comes to childcare. But the nurse thing....why was the nurse at her house? Why…

6/18/14

Him: this is so funny Fi! These feminists keep bitchin' about how men don't do as much housework. But we like, build the fences, ya know? I'm reeeallly lettin' 'em have it. How long until dinner is ready?

6/18/14

"Fact" does not mean what you think it means.

6/18/14

Gawker comment section is filled with so much less misogyny than Jezebel these days. Even posts on the same stories. It's depressing. I don't even think some of these dudes read Gawker, they just come straight to Jezebel to air out all their complaints.

6/18/14

Fantasy.fucking.baseball.

6/18/14

But some man, somewhere, built a fence and that counts, right? Lol.

6/18/14

Yeah, this is too perfect. I loved how he rambled on about how men are spending all their damn time building fences and then admitted he hasn't ever built one. Pretty sure his idea of what men do and what men actually do is a tad off. Although my darling and I patched a fence together one time. This reminds me I need…

6/18/14

1. You can see how a graphic video from is different from medical professionals at a hospital taking five minutes to consult with their *own patients* about their medical needs, right?

6/18/14

Jesus. I've resisted making this comment for so long, but I've been on Jezebel 4ever, and things have gotten really fucking bad in the last couple of years. The commenters make it, but that's probably the philosophy that let my favorite commenter become an editor. Anyway. Thanks for the above post.