The no fly list is a secret, no visibility into who’s on it or why. Seems like a real bad plan to restrict firearm purchases based on a secret government list.

Not gonna lie, I laughed out loud.

Forget my weirdest sex dream, LET’S TALK ABOUT SPIKE. Good god, I would do very bad things with that man, (with his fake accent)

The lesson here is never cave. Lying works.

Brilliant. Four out of four possible stars.

Posted above, but similar dumb school story:

Great story, but three weeks? Wow, that seems excessive.

This is so stupid.

I drew a dick in white-out on a girl named Brittany’s dark blue, monogrammed backpack in 7th grade (using the B as the balls and drawing the shaft out to the left behind it, of course) and got suspended for three weeks. My dad made me mow the lawn every single day because he didn’t know how else to punish me. It was a…

My MIL has bought each of those for our house. I told her the decal got damaged in the last move, and I dust off the dream cutout when she comes to visit.

We have the same friends?

Man, this has been a vindicating week for snarkaholics, hasn’t it?

If I see another wall decal that says LIVE LOVE LAUGH or a wooden cutout of the word “DREAM” in someone’s home I’m gonna scream.

oh my god oh my god I’m losing it at my desk because I couldn’t read the name properly at first and now that I have hahahahaha

this dilemna causes me undue empathy stress. i’m going to pretend i never read this.

Here’s my favorite. It’s so beautiful *wipes tear from eye*

I work as a property manager for high-end vacation homes. The décor is full of wall “art” with those dumb platitudes written in embellished fonts. Sometimes I walk past them and my eyes roll so hard they almost get stuck in the back of my head.

“special dining events on the rear spoiler, etc.”

“Maybe something awkward happened to put you and your partner off of sex”