Also they were named “Nick and Nora Chuck”, which I didn’t discover until adulthood was actually a play on “Nick and Nora Charles” from the Thin Man movies.

That theme song is forever etched into my brain.

ba ba ba baba ba BA
ba ba ba ba ba BA BA BAAAAAA
SQUARE ONE

I find the Toasty Cheez-Its to be delightful, myself.  After eating those, none of the other varieties will do.

Spanfeller’s Twitter account remains open for some reason, and folks are letting him have it there.

To paraphrase that nice old lady from Ace Ventura, “Jim Spanfeller should die of Gonorrhea and rot in hell.”

I did not have that VHS.  Also, I know that DC Talk did a lot of promoting and fund raising for various anti-racism programs, but that quote is super cringy.  

It doesn’t get much better than this, Luis.  

Well, this song came out in 1992, so Olive Garden was still considered a good place to take a date. In fact, when this song came out I had not even heard of Olive Garden, so I just assumed that he took her to an actual garden of olives.  I was twelve and I was a doofus.

Also, all I listened to in middle school through my first couple years in college was country and Christian music.  I posted those lyrics from memory because THE DC TALK LYRICS REFUSE TO LEAVE MY BRAIN. 

From mega group DC Talk’s seminal album, “Free at Last”:

The other night I met a girl and she looked to be so nice
I asked her for her digits and she didn’t think twice
A couple days later, I called her up and asked her out
She said “with you?”, I said “with me”, and she said “without a doubt”
I took her to the garden…

WINGS OF SILVER
NERVES OF STEEL
SIL-VERRR-HAWKS
(hawk screech noise)

Silverhawks was a fantastic show.

At first I thought you typed “Leslie Nielsen” and I was quite taken aback.

+1 for the Rudd Gif.  :-D

Well, Lil’ Sebastian died a few years ago, but I’ll stop if it means his erection can live on.

I LOVE YOU AND LOVE EATING PASTRAMI WITH YOU, MY HUMAN HUSBAND.  WE DO ENJOY THE HUMAN ACT OF EATING SANDWICHES AND ARE IN NO WAY ROBOTS.  COME, LET US ENJOY SOME HUMAN PASTRAMI AND DELICIOUS NEHI COLA.

She doesn’t let him look at her during sex, either.

Laughter is intrinsic to this process.  He saves up his laughs because they are the energy that fuels this spell.

*Somewhere in a darkened shack in the Massachusetts wilderness, Bill Belichick stands over a steaming cauldron, the cowl of a jet-black hoodie obscuring all but his mouth as fresh blood from an unknown tenth-round draft pick from 2012 drips off of a ceremonial dagger into the bubbling witch’s brew.*

“Double double,…

Puddles puts on one of the best live shows I’ve ever seen.  He is freaking brilliant.