People with their faces buried in smart phones annoy the shit out of me. I was picking up a pizza and the girl in front of me was juggling 6 different things (3 pizzas, napkins, hot peppers, her change, her phone, a 2-liter bottle of soda) and I know she could use some help opening the door out of the shop. I look…

Sadly enough, we both already have each other blocked, because we know we're unhealthy to one another, but he won't privacy protect. And since he used to call me a crazy psycho bitch on Reddit, once I knew his Twitter handle I knew I'd be checking periodically. But I hadn't spoken to him for three weeks before his…

OKC Messages of the Week:

I have an exboyfriend who won't stop insulting me on Twitter, and while I don't miss him enough to actually /care/ that he calls me a vile waste of space, it's still hurtful.

And I'm having a really hard time not paying attention to it.

It's really brave of her to share her experience.

Grapes Scones Trampoline

on her mother's side?

That sex scene was like the screenwriter thought of all the most uncomfortable places to have sex and committed them all to the screen. Those marble stairs? Gah! That huge uncomfortable looking desk? Ouch! The floor with hardcover books falling all over them? Someone call an ambulance, I might be concussed.

Oh my God, the other day my boyfriend and I were watching a long line of people (who we later figured out were preparing for a show) carrying these ridiculous, neon-green branch-like things over a bridge in our city and my boyfriend turned to me and asked, "Do you think they're going to kill Macbeth?"

Once, after sharing some wine with some girls on my floor, I went on a lengthy tangent about the Disney animated version of Robin Hood. For years, they would tease me by saying, "Robin Hood is foxy!"

I'm going to put a trigger warning for (consensual) violence and abuse on this (thus guaranteeing that this won't be the winner) but here's mine.

CURRENT: shoulder hair. My bf is a hairy yeti-man and I have grown to covet his endless body fur. When we get down to business I can grab onto his hairy shoulders and when we cuddle I just kind of rub them and get all excited by the sensory awesomeness that is body hair. It's primal and it's soft and manly and boy…

I'm obviously the other side of the fence here (gender wise), but Oh My, CJ getting angry at the podium does wonders for me. *fans self*

Ron Swanson.

I cringe with embarassment over it and when my husband found out he pissed himself laughing. I hate nearly every republican and/or libertarian I've ever known. I hate uber-patriotic people. I hate dudes who think their alpha, but Ron f***ing Swanson pulls it off with something magical and wonderful and…

My ex-boyfriend was always confused why I liked him so much in polo shirts. But the juxtaposition between the uptight look of the polo shirt and the bad boy look of numerous arm tattoos was ridiculously sexy.

the taste of cigarettes and alcohol still turns me on. It reminds me of making out on the dance floor in college

I had an enduring crush throughout childhood and adolescence. The object of my crush? My super handsome Hapa cousin. My first cousin. I learned that in CA it was legal to marry a cousin, so I told myself it wasn't too weird.

I nominate my ex. She would get absurdly turned on when I affected a (horrible) "dockworker" brogue that I guess was a mix of the Bronx, Good Will Hunting, and Rocky Balboa. And we were a crazy couple who stayed together long past our expiration date because of the sex, and we did a lot of kinky stuff, but that was…

Happy trails. Man sweat. Speaking in a foreign language. Juggling a soccer ball. Driving safely. Knowing how to start a fire. A well placed curse word. The band of a guy's boxers sticking out slightly from the waistline of his jeans. Shirt sleeves rolled up to the forearms. Assuming I want queso and ordering it…