Ah dear. As always, the socially inept with a tendency to objectify and dehumanise women will flock to these, when what they seriously need is the ability to even know how to talk to a woman first. Who the hell hires someone to message someone else and write their dating profile on their behalf? I agree that they'd be…

My god, how did I miss that episode?

I called my dad a cunt one time and the aftermath was kind of ugly. It's been four years since then and he hasn't spoken to me even one time. We're both better off.

I have a huge fucking vocabulary; the two things are not correlated.

I tend to agree. However, I have met a few people who have an excellent vocabulary and when they skillfully pepper in a few swears it can be WONDERFUL.

my first word was fuck. and that's what i do. ALLLLLLL NIIIIIIIIGHT. god i need to stop shooting fireball.

The reporter had to be nothing short of Cronkite caliber to resist saying "That's what she said"

Can a vagina wince? My vagina just sympathy winced.

"That's what we like long and big. That's what I am," he said.

Toby Zeigler is my spirit animal...

Donna is my patronus.

ALL CJ GIFS!!!

I thought you left handjobs behind once you learned to actually have sex. It had probably been 10 years since I'd given a hand job (I mean a proper one, not a foreplay one before moving on to sucking it) and then a couple of years ago my then bf asked for one. So i guess some adult men still like them but any other…

I wish this article had a happy ending =(

And also, this should be added as a side note... there isn't a woman on the planet who can make a handjob feel as good as I can for myself. I know what my penis likes; I play with it the most and I've had it for 27 years. You can give a great handjob in general and still not give one as well as I do for myself.

Sophisticated hand job = gloves, darling.