-Jason Mantzoukas

Todd can write circles around Randall. And most of the current crop of AVClub writers, really.

Grab your broadswords, the quickconing has begun!

Most theaters near me have shifted to selling alcohol and better food which actually aren’t priced that terribly compared to eating out. I can get a 32 oz craft beer for $13, for example.

But seriously. Popcorn is like 99.5% profit, and so is soda. They’d lose very little. 

Sorry Chancellor, on first read, I thought you said “Pornpass”. I was wondering why I’d need unlimited snacks. As if I’d have a free hand.

I'll supply the torches and pitchforks!

Trumptrolls are the icing on the cake.

as far as the eye can see.....

Sigh, I wish more people followed in your footsteps to countertroll the troll with humor instead of engaging with their bad faith bullshit.

The only stand up of his I will defend is his impression of Matthew McConaughey getting the lifetime achievement award. It’s dumb as shit, but it cracks me up.

Did you watch The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret? - it’s pretty good

I’m outraged by how I like everything David Cross does except his stand-up

Manson periodically came up for parole. He couldn’t seem to keep the crazy under control, but he did go before the Board.

I disagree. Other developed nations that are more reluctant to throw people away, that focus on rehabilitation and often cap sentencing at less time than Chapman has served, have much healthier societies. Their crime rates and recidivism rates are much lower. If America accepted that vengeance is not justice, we’d be…

“We don’t need to call the cops. I mean, you guys are smart than real cops. You’re mall cops. Why do we need real cops?”

Yes, the worst thing anyone can do is kill someone famous. There should absolutely be different parole standards for high profile celebrity murderers. 

RIP. He was so big in the 80s that Carson would crack jokes about him in his monologue--which, back then,  was how you knew you had made it.

You know - If I had to imagine the face of the guy who got fired for posting his farts... Yeah. Pretty much that guy.

Revised list for radio version: