He got drunk & had unprotected sex with his friend’s sister, then married her?

They were doing a The Music Man halftime and he assigned her one of the famous songs, minus 7 trombones

Electrolytes: it’s what fancy dogs crave.

I would like to see a new ball added after every 15 minutes of scoreless minutes played.

I won’t ever forgive her or Verlander for their classless little fits they threw over kneeling NFL athletes when that was a thing. I do not doubt for a minute that Kate acted the way they reporter her to have. Kate’s uncle is a long-time Republican Congressman up here in Michigan, and the family is from the Whirlpool…

I’m a huge Lebron fan (from his time on the Heat). There’s never been another player like him and there likely won’t ever be. He is definitely the man.

Married for almost a decade. Not so hard. Maybe because I didn’t rush into it until I was older. Two marriages dunzo by 32 is suggesting something.

Yep, 100% - someone who knows how not to waste their money instead of waiting just because everyone else is wasting their money that day is way sexier than someone who spends all their money today because everyone else is.

I would have just waited a day and celebrated then... belated valentine’s day?

Ugh. A racist AND a homophone!

A 60 year old man wearing a baseball uniform waddles out to a small grassy hillock. Before him stretches a rolling grassland leading to the bushy outliers of a vast and dark wood. The soft old man raises his hand and sounds an air horn. The blast fills the plain before him with sound. A short while later there is a…

That’s the worst punishment he could have received.

Why is it any of your Goddamned business how she spent her own money?

Per Gawker policy, the only way to be financially successful is to be an awful human being who will be up against the wall come the revolution. Nobody ever comes by money through honesty, talent, or hard work.

Hamilton envies people who can afford $2m worth of jewelry, and he ascribes independent moral significance to his emotions.

I’m waiting to hear what the issue is with having $2m worth of jewelry.

I hope somebody is there to remind the burglars of the mess they left when they went away.

Have you seen a typical 50-something suburban white dude’s Facebook feed?

Don’t forget that Petraeus was actually convicted of doing what Hillary Clinton was merely accused of doing.

Providing someone goes through the steps stated above, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the advice given.