There is a difference between being attracted to someone and recognizing someone is attractive. There are people that I am not attracted to but I recognize that they are attractive people.

I’m not attracted to Black people either, and I’m Black. I also have known quite a few other people who either expressed or demonstrated a marked preference for one (or two) ethnicity over others.

No offense, but you may be hearing it more in the women because everyone tends to judge women more harshly. I’m also not a fan of the sound, but the linguistics professor did research that showed that older people dislike vocal fry whereas younger people found it very authoritative sounding. This American Life’s style…

Please document these things before you go. Redact names, etc., of course, but copy, copy, copy. And then find the angry person and offer the help with the class-action suit.

Well gaslighting is a whole different issue. The people who do that are almost always doing it deliberately.

But you’re missing the point a little bit. I’m not saying that “not meaning it” is an acceptable excuse. I’m saying that people who really don’t mean it are going to have a hard time accepting that it’s a real thing, rather than just your thing, since they know they don’t mean it.

It’s certainly something to hear Ira Glass say that his co-workers were criticized for vocal fry and not him.

This is why the term “microaggression” is a very real thing, even if people roll their eyes at it.... It’s all the cumulative little things, the background radiation, that adds up to the message of You Are Not Wanted or You Are Insufficient.

There was a study on gender in the workplace by Professor Tinsley at Georgetown which actually went into exactly this in performance reviews. Women will typically receive positive feedback that is then “leveled” by something they need to work on, if they receive positive feedback at all. Very similar to your “great…

I totally see your point, and I think having a non-confrontational attitude when discussing issues like this does help, but I don’t really think “not meaning it that way” should be an acceptable excuse. It’s the prejudices we don’t realize we have which are the most dangerous, and as such, I think it’s the nature of…

“-During this same organizational change where ppl are losing their jobs, one of the VPs insists we “do something” special financially for two senior male managers because “they have families to support.” The only female manager at their level receives no similar consideration, though when I ask around I find out that…

I’m a woman in tech (ux / content strategy) and I’m the only one in my office (we’ve got one other female employee, but she’s in our other office). I’m lucky in that all of the dudes I work with are awesome and my boss is very aware of the challenges that women face in our industry.

This is my life * 1000:

Woman in tech here. Evaluation, was given the feedback that I was too aggressive, and that I was not promoted because of it. Changed jobs, same company. LITERALLY my next review, was told I wasn’t aggressive enough, and wouldn’t get promoted because of it.

Amen. I’m probably entering this world too and I’m READY. While job searching, I’ve been contacting high ranking people in companies I want to work for and writing messages telling them how qualified I am/they should consider hiring me. I’ve been getting interviews, which tells me they’re a) impressed by my initiative…

Did you listen to that This American Life podcast where they talk about ‘vocal fry’? Apparently they get regular complaints about young women on the show because of this particular affect. Young men the same age also have vocal fry, but they never get complaints about that. I’d never heard of the expression before the…

teachers should not be bringing students to hooters, even if they are all adults. It’s completely inappropriate. You should report his ass, both to the administration and the school paper if it has one

This is why I went into medicine and not tech. I know that female doctors don’t have it better than most other fields, but at least I can be my own boss and not worry about being passed over for promotions, etc.

Grad school? Grad school was the worst for me! Professors and students alike are all sexist idiots all of them! I also went to grad school where we had students and professors from all over the world and that’s when I learned men all over the world are sexist pigs that think commenting on my sex life, body, and…

All women in Tech can tell you about meetings that they were not invited to, completed assignments that they did not receive credit for, plum assignments given to less deserving male colleagues, SUPER condescension from said male colleagues, in addition to having any initiative squashed by said male colleagues that…