The most obvious solution is usually the best one.

The irony!

"WAAAAHHH! How dare they not let me hit on them!!! WHY MUST THEY BE ALLOWED TO FINISH THEIR SENTENCES?!"

Instinct tells me a lot of his male colleagues don't find him particularly pleasant, either.

whatever im just going to light him on fire

So this incident happened to me when I was an undergrad. Let me preface this by saying that I am adamantly a skeptic. I do not believe that there is an afterlife; I do not believe in ghosts; I do not believe in premonition. Period. I think simple brain chemistry explains 75% of hauntings.

Goosebumps for DAYZ.

I come down to the kitchen for breakfast on a Saturday morning. My mom and my sister are already up, and they look exhausted. My mom asks, "Did you sleep alright?"

So I told what I thought was the one story I had that was spooky story worthy. But then this happened over Christmas:

Okay, so here is mine.

I have a story!

I live in a very old area of town. Almost every other house on my street is a "century home" with a little plaque saying it was built in 1905 or sometime thereabouts. Mine doesn't just because it costs money to get that title.

I pride myself on my car trip taking patience. I never rush, I take frequent breaks, and I try to generally enjoy the car trip as much as is possible. Sometimes this leads to overnight stays in random hotels in Connecticut.

You hang out with people who think women and olive-sized embryos are of equal value. Indeed, I do not. I hang out with people who value women a lot more than that.

"It's not something we choose to do," he added. "And frankly I would be willing to stop showing the photos if the killings would stop. If it saves one life here at this campus or at The Alamo, then it is worth exposing this, or maybe offending some people's feelings."

I know whenever I get pregnant accidentally, I head to the Alamo to think things through.

He'd better be careful – insisting that women and mothers have an innate understanding of illness and public health is one slippery slope away to thinking women are capable of exercising reproductive autonomy.

I just love how the hypocrisy and paranoia shows in all of his statements. There's so much of it, and it's so stupid, it's actually funny.

Gohmert also said that he thought there was "some deal" between the United States and West African nations–"that's why they won't do a travel ban"

The only right answer is to fuck Anderson Cooper, marry Neil Patrick Harris, and kill Andy Cohen. I believe these are self-explanatory so I won't bore you with my reasoning.