Browsing through the list of celebrity fragrances, I can see why some people might be embarrassed purchasing some of these. Interesting entries include Carlos Santana, Svetlana Stalin, Callum Best and Kiss.

"Oh, no, I don't need your number. Remember, I stole your cell phone? I'll call you when you get your new phone."

Dear [SELF e-mail Subscriber],

"Michelle Trachtenberg's getup is objectively cute, but there's something about it I'm not loving...and no, it's not the purple, I swear"

More Tommy from Quinzee posts, please.

If that hipster can have that mustache, then the lady can do as she pleases with her pits AND wear sleeveless shirts.

No Joel McHale? But I wanted to see him in something besides a skinny tie and jeans.

@TransFat: It is super fun! I find the more violent the sport, the better it works with the Anal rule. So baseball and basketball, not so great. But football and hockey, super great!

@TransFat: Fact: most NFL team names are improved by preceding them with Anal.

@Skellatrix: Actually, that's the best looking cupcake cake I have ever seen.

@CurtCole: Behold. Cuppies.

I told my broker to sell all my shares of cupcakes and put it all in Dippin' Dots; after all, it's the ice cream of the future.

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@1980 David Bowie From The Music Video Ashes To Ashes: Like Larry Johnson, I believe there needs to be more Larry Johnson.

No mention of Larry Johnson? The man is so kind and generous, sharing his alcoholic beverages and hair rearrangement services with so many women.

@AuntieBee: As of yet, no. Amazing, isn't it?

@Elizabooth: Stop stealin' my brain waves!

Finally, the perfect accessory for the diamond encrusted vagina my sister thinks she has.

Perez Hilton is getting in on this too, threatening to bring Seacrest down... ugh it won't end.

@notwhoyouthoughtiwas: He's legally changing his name to King Spencer Pratt. Thankfully, he hasn't gotten much press for it. Sshhh...