How amazingly dumb that they never identify which version of Mario Kart they’re talking about. Useless.

Durability vs price will basically kill this concept on the spot.

You’re SOL. The “bullet train” won’t actually be bullet speed. It’ll actually be slower than Amtrak, at fifty times the cost. They originally promised two-and-a-half hour travel times, now the estimates range from 3.5 hours for the typical transits and 5 hours on many routes.

Everyone should have their license plate number be a cell phone number for the car itself. So you can call up Mr. 9RXV786 and tell him to move the fuck over and stop blocking two lanes.

My product has you beat, I’m going to eliminate flat tires forever.

After putting on the sticker, take out a pocketknife and score it.

Even the replay is shitty tho

As I had previously learned on Lifehacker 7 years ago, add:

HOT TAKE: If you sit in the aisle and there’s no one in the middle seat, then you share it with the guy in the window seat and it’s like you both get 1.5 sets.

Absolutely. You want to hit in front of the corner at a shallow angle so it “wraps around” and goes down the back. Quiet, zero splash back.

The grape bags at the store don’t even close. They’re sold gaping open. Of course you can try them.

You can’t discuss this film without mentioning the God-awful merchandising.

“When Berger dug into the $6.99 pint, he was bummed to find that it was harder and less creamy than the regular ice cream he was hoping for.”

The Sponsored Audible barrier has already been broken.

The best host has the guest wifi password prominently displayed

Mere moral celebacies

It’s almost as if the monarchy is an incestuous tangle

Seriously. No wonder we haven’t gone back to the moon with dullards like these running things!

Yet again, another fucking video that doesn’t answer the fucking question in the headline.