This whole newsletter push ever since the verdict is just to get a database of potential readers once the Gawker empire shuts down and a new place opens up, right?

The eternal question being, is “Ordering in” literal, like pizza or Chinese? Or is it a euphamism? Because I know several people who refer to Tinder and/or Grindr as “Ordering In”.

How, exactly, do teams and players decide who will be the first one into the locker room? I imagine someone like JJ Watt makes sure he’s the first guy in line. But what if he’s running late? Does he show up at the stadium five minutes before the door opens, then cut to the front of the line, ahead of all the rookies,…

Hitler wasn’t all that bad, after all, he killed Hitler.

Selfie is short for “Self Portrait”. If someone else takes the picture, it’s just a regular portrait. So, unless he’s holding the camera, ‘tis not a ‘Selfie’.

Waaaaaay back in the day, I used to volunteer at a radio station for the blind where we’d read daily newspapers and magazines and whatever. My beat was local news and advertising circulars (even the blind need to know what’s on sale this week at Target). The guy after me read old Ellery Queen mystery magazines and…

I have a co-worker who’s mother was a She Smith who married a He Smith, and my coworker married another Smith herself. Despite my petitioning her to go by She Smith-Smith Smith, she did not.

His new commercial is great, he bursts into a meeting with an idea, and says “What are you gonna do, find another Colonel?”, only to see they’re all discussing new options for Col. Sanders (including Gary Busey, Tim Meadows, Gilbert Gottfried, a Labrador Retriever, Tori Spelling, Artie Lange and some dude with a six…

“I’m home!”

Re: Celebrity Polygamists, I’m pretty sure Tilda Swinton has two husbands.

Surely damage due to an Act of War is not an issue, as that is a US Congressional vehicle, no? Seems you’d be covered by the government, provided it survives.

Willie Stargell used to give Stargell Stars to players who had good games, back in the pillbox hat days. The Pirates brought them back for their 2013 playoff run. Then MLB killed it because of their licensing deals.

There’s an old conspiracy theory (pre-DaVinci Code) that there’s a hidden message in the epigram that reveals that 1) Shakespeare didn’t write Shakespeare’s plays, and 2) unpublished plays were buried in the grave instead. I believe it was published in an issue of “GAMES” magazine in the 90s.

That cat looks like it weighs 40 pounds.

Nah, it’s gotta be fish. Salmonella, it’s got a fish right in the name!

So they weren’t using actual, physical stopwatches after all. They were using the overlay, exactly as stated in the other article, which somehow doesn’t know what those words mean.

It says they used a “stopwatch overlay”. Not actual physical stopwatches. They did “count the frames”.

Nope. The nuclear explosion could only be set off by a precisely timed explosion of other material that surrounded the nuclear material. It’s like a softball placed inside a basketball of dynamite, and you have to set off all the dynamite in the basketball in just the right way so that the explosion crushes the…

They were in the 3rd period... overtime.

I totally get you about playing archaeologist when digging out the snow. I do the same thing with the cat’s litter box. Sift through it and pull out the treasures. It’s almost no longer a chore.