I actually learned something quite useful from this letter, and I think some of you would agree:

“I’d love to see wilt shit all down the basketball family tree that steph is trying to look up.”

How come every time I take a seat at a hotel bar, no matter where it is, I end up seated next to this guy?

Perception is the only thing an offensive line has, because 99 percent of people watching football have no idea what an offensive line’s doing.

As a goalie, I will say there’s nothing more therapeutic than smashing the net off its moorings.

he uses computers all the time. computers love him. he has fantastic computers, with many many friends.

Nice use of the contrapositive.

He didn't dodge the ball so I guess he can't dodge a wrench.

I appreciate a guy like Joe Johnson who has been so obviously up front about his career ambitions, to make as much money as possible with the least amount of pressure.

Damn.

Totally expected this response (and it’s totally fair - I have no clue what I am doing in this arena and was, in fact, incredibly proud of even this abomination).

Lose-Lose-Lose*

First of all, Greg — big fan. Congrats on the fellowship or whatever you just got handed.

“That’s all fine and good....but is it a sandwich?”

It’s a simple question. If you were a hotdog, would you eat yourself?

Despicable. The only thing that should have been laid out flat on its side was the phone they used to film the workout.

“Sandoval lost 20 pounds over the offseason, but as the evidence bears out, that seems wrong.”

Kung Fu Panda Express