Excuse me sir, the cunt community doesn’t wish to be associated with the Trump Shit Show.

This guy is such a cunt.

The Folding Table Emporium and Zubaz Outlet.

I dont wear glasses. I love spicy food. I slurp my noodles. Yeah, i’ve had a couple of really bad experiences where i’ve essentially pepper sprayed my own eyeballs with noodles.

...and yet you have deigned to give voice to its terribleness.

I’ll wait here while you figure out what to do with the event horizon of irony you’ve just spawned.

My goodness, did the guy he savagely attacked at least get the Bronze for Figure Skating?

The Arizona legislature has come to regret hiring Dan Cortese to draft the state’s criminal code in the late ‘90s.

If he doesn’t clean up his act soon, he’s flirting with a multi-game suspension.

If she has ever been in the vicinity of Mayweather chances are he hit her.

I’m sure you’ll FIG-ure it out

Just as absurd as a virgin birth, walking on water, multiplying fish and loaves of bread, transubstantiation, and rising from the dead in my opinion. Religions are absurd.

the best of George Lucas’s “Star Wars” entries (“Attack of the Clones” and “Revenge of the Sith”).

To pen an authentic and intellectual cinema review – the kind worthy of publication in America’s snootiest airport magazine – one must remember to include countless, such as it were, asides and clauses, seemingly without a purpose other than rendering one’s prose an inarticulate gruel of half thoughts, all while…

Fuck

Cease Bowel Functions.

Fun fact. Shreveport also has 21+ casinos! The reason they could film there was due to the LA tax breaks AND the fact that Shreveport could double for some downtown and rural shots, all in a quick 15-20 minute drive.

Hah. I could totally see Rob Corddry doing that. If I had that kind of exchange with him I would have been laughing my ass off. Maybe it just seems less dickish in my head and I imagine him trying to be funny rather than just being a prick.

It warms the cockles of my heart knowing that Dave Attell is as cool as I think he is.

Goldfish are meant to be shared, friend.