You needn't "newsflash" me. That's really obnoxious. So you know, I live in New York City, I've been here my whole life, and I know how shit works. I still find privilege to be a problem. I'm not saying Lena Dunham's success is based on Judd Apatow. I'm saying it's based on her upbringing. And it is.

Wait — I'm supposed to find it italic-worthy amazing that a wealthy, art-world connected white girl from Tribeca was given a platform for her Millennial navel-gazing, "controversial" nudity, and employing her equally rich best friends? This is not even about whether or not the show is good. It may very well be good,…

I know, right? Shouldn't it be sparkling, or look like a gold LEGO shirt, or something? It's just a fugly mustard-colored shirt. With short sleeves. He looks like an idiot. And how do you dry clean that thing?

You are a wonderful, wonderful person :)

They were really wimpy gauges too, like maybe the size of pencil erasers. Dude, if you're going to be well into your thirties with those things, go balls out. Now Judes is yelling at someone who just said "yadda yadda" while telling her story (like how do you go into JJ's court and not know that "yadda yadda," like…

TRISCUTS

I'm watching Judge Judy. She just yelled "Not in my America!" to a grown-ass man with ear gauges who is blaming an 11-year-old kid on a bike for causing him to hit the kid with his own bike. Boredom is my business.

Thinking ahead — you are a smart woman.

you are on FIYAH tonight! thank you for all the crack-ups

Everyone needs to click on that People link one more time because your comment is 100% true.

You are a modern-day Harriet the Spy!! :)

"19th century mechanical piggy bank"

I'm not kicking buff Chris Pratt out of bed for eating crackers, but schlubby Chris Pratt is the best. He's just so handsome AND cuddly soft.

Are you sure it has cake inside though? It's like a steampunk cake by way of Victoria magazine. It looks like it's made of tin, like those old-timey train car toys. I like my cakes to look like cake. I'm a petits four fan myself. ;)

I live in NYC and I never hear anything as goofy as that comment! (I especially love the aggressiveness of the the "you know I only came here" part—it's so ridiculous.)

The Homer gif is a thing of beauty.

And now I feel bad for badmouthing a random Bostonian cake designer. :(

I know there's a lot more important stuff going on in this Dirt Bag, but Cheryl Hines's and Robert Kennedy's wedding cake is the ugliest fucking thing I've ever seen. It looks like it's made of metal.

I'm still amazed at how well this was cast. I mean Keke IS Chilli. It's uncanny.

It's awful, but I still sort of love this story for its sheer randomness.