welp, looks like it's about time for me to have another IASIP marathon.

That blurb from Esquire becomes downright delightful if you imagine David Byrne singing it in an extended version of "Once in a Lifetime."

I don't think the world would be able to handle that.

The first time I went to Girl Scout camp, our head counselor told us the story of how, when she was a little girl, she went to use the latrines one night, and while she was sitting down, doing her business, she felt something cold and wet rub against her bum. She screamed and jumped up and a raccoon stuck its head out…

Please, Lizzy. We all know you two are dating, just like we all know that right before you two get married, you'll be swept away by some dashing maverick, leaving Marsden all alone. Again.

If, under your rule, assholes like this guy never see the light of day, much less have access to firearms, you have my vote.

They actually tested this before in the States. or at least, they had them at the McDonald's in Union City, NJ about...7 or 8 years ago. I don't know if they'll be the same, but those were SO FREAKIN' GOOD. I'm excited about this, not gonna lie.

was hoping for this one.

That would make too much sense.

I was going to post this myself, so bravo!

This is our punishment for unleashing the Kardashians upon the world.

UGH. People are so freakin' clueless. They just can't comprehend that their reality isn't the same as everyone else's.

But you can bet there will still be people commenting on this article saying, "no no, they're just lazy. If they really wanted to lose weight, they would make time!"

...I need to go and do some squats.

Huffington Post ran an article last week about how differently the media treats black victims and white suspects/killers, and it was so infuriating and disheartening to have it all laid out like that. eta: the link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/14/med…

I'm shocked, too. I thought for sure he'd get away with murdering her.

I'm so baffled by the branch. It's not even pretty.

Somebody give this person my address. I will take ALL OF THEM.

"boots and pants and boots and pants" is going to be stuck in my head all day. THANKS OBAMA.

I don't know who I love more in this video - him, or Anna Faris.