I do! I do!

In my experiences (as a waiter not a customer) the difference is really the caliber of restaurant in which you are dining. The more casual places I worked in instructed the waitstaff to clear plates as soon as a guest was done eating; however, once I worked my way up into fine dining I had such ridiculous notions…

I’m intentionally ignoring her daughter’s shinylocks out of jealousy

“interpretive jiggery-pokery" sounds like my dance moves

I don’t care what her kids look like, I want to talk about this amazing outfit

was born female

I own nothing from J Crew proper.

thanks*

oh man sick burn

have you ever heard of a 'joke'

Clyde’s in Chinatown?

My dear friend and her husband run a small, upscale, BYOB place right outside of Princeton. I worked for them for the first few years they were open, and although they were both hardasses (very high standards for both food and service), they had our backs as well. Because this is a white tablecloth, serve from the…

lol ok madeleine I think you’re wonderful but come to DC in july and YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR TUNE

Oh yeah, MANY MANY times people would accidentally say “Sweden” when they meant to say “Scotland.” Like, “oh this is Kate, she just moved here from...Sweden?” ......wut??????

I moved to the US from Scotland when I was 9, and I cannot tell you how many times schoolmates asked me “how do you say ‘hello’ in Scottish?”

Jean + Wanda = Janda? Wean?

or as my dad calls him, "Kip Harrison"

You gotta check the site. My sister lives around the corner from the store in Soho, and so I go every time I visit her, and I think I’ve only ever bought like two things from the brick & mortar store. I think it’s partly due to the way they organize everything? But I have bought more things from them online than I can…

I’ll never disclose how many people I’ve slept with, because I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA

RUBY DUMPED HIM