I got kicked out of a bar for throwing olives at the bartender. I have been kicked out of a lot of places for various reasons, but all of those were when I was like 21-24. The olive incident, however, was just like a year ago...

Also: there are plenty of adults willing to pay good money to be degraded and humiliated. Almost certainly would be a pay increase for a teacher

Sad news. RIP

I started commenting because Denton knew my fetish deets and threatened to expose them if I didn’t become the best commenter ever. He approved.

Only a fool would fall for this sort of scam. Now excuse me while I send $300 to Elongator for six pills that they have assured me will add inches to my dick in just three weeks! There is a money-back guarantee so I know it’s legit..

What about if someone is on their way to take a dump?

My wife says he is weirdly sexy, and I never quite got it, but there is something about that top gif.. Almost like a nerdy Henry Winkler

The Fistfest is still considered a family event when held in Kentucky...

The inside of the peach emoji should be slightly rigid and extra tight, for his pleasure as well...

His face looks like a boil, maybe he ruptured...

I strap down everything except the first aid kit, so that when I collide with a wall like that it conveniently flies directly into the back of my head and I can get right to work patching up any surviving family members. I’ve always been a planner

Which alternative chewy hair vitamin will you be purchasing? Asking for a friend

It’s ok, guys bleed out their wieners too. Constantly! And nobody ever talks about it.

You guys are only making fun of the way it looks because you’re a bunch of Phobophobes...

I am always shocked there are so many active shooter fears in this country. An inactive shooter seems much more likely in America, sitting on a bench picking off civilians in between bites of his philly cheesesteak.

“Some artists need to play a character to achieve success,” said Jimmy.

Are raccoons good animals or bad animals and why?

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