The best thing about Deer Valley is all the soccer moms videotaping their kids coming down the slopes. 

Or the Madlib theory when they [verb] a bunch of [plural noun] all [preposition] a [place.]

Or the MadBum Theory, where they give up home runs into large bodies of water and get butthurt about it.

MadMen Theory: Drink a bottle of scotch before lunch. This applies to everyone: owner, general manager, scouts, coaches and players.

I’m hoping they move and rebrand as Rayons du Diable.

And just like modern BMWs, they are stuck in the shop with broken sensors that are waiting to be fixed by the manufacturer after being forced to admit they fucked up.

BMW drivers dream to have this level of asshat parking job

If you yourself have any AL East-related poetry

Roses are red
Some balls go foul
Here’s A-Rod shitting
Next to his towel.

Finally, a video that belongs on Deadspin.

“Rock journalism: People who can’t write, doing interviews with people who can’t think, in order to prepare articles for people who can’t read.”

he is a small, angry Trumper.  No way he’s even allowed to look at her old Playboy pics

Just curious, but when you made the eggs 9 ways, did you make them to Sunday?

The podcast accompanying the episodes goes into great detail about this.  

Targeting the knobs is all well and good, but you’re still gonna get problems from the wankers, yobbos, and bell ends.

Jay Cutler: [moves to Greece]

The Buccaneers know that, but they’d never admit it in Publix. 

Mt Everest: Come for the views, stay because you died.

It’s Honey Badger, not money badger.

Odd. Normally, it’s the Catholic schoolboys who get pounded in the butt by a man with a cross.