I'm now imagining a Tolkien /Disney shared universe, where Doc and the Seven Dwarves are the descendants of Thorin Oakenshield and his crew, and the mine where they sing as they pry out gems is the same Lone Mountain that Smaug had taken over.

And lemme tell you something else—any half-decent playwright would 'Euripedes' plays up!

Think you I of country matters?

Maybe I need to re-see this; I remember it as being fine, but not essential. What it did do very well was take an 80's trope—straight-laced guy gets pulled into a crazy road trip by a colorful uninhibited bohemian woman—and take it past jittery-ness to actual life-threatening danger. And it basically gave the world…

Oh fuck cancer so much.

So many good ones. "Destiny got you dressed this morning, Arthur—and now fear is trying to pull off your pants!"

John Cleese is 6' 6"! And he could use the money!
…okay, I'll shut up.

He does look like he's going to send Chekov to the agony booth again…

My whole opinion of Alexander changed after I watched the documentary The Best Worst Thing (about the Broadway show in which he debuted) on Netflix. For one thing, the guy today looks exactly the same as he did in 1980. For another, he looks very different from George Costanza (and is clearly a lot less agitated and…

Or singing Sondheim lyrics.

Oh yes. And even within the show, that's a stupid way to play ping-pong. Google "ping pong girl crazy ex-girlfriend" to watch the video.

With Massive Attack as the opening act.

Amazingly, all the women were Canadian which is why you've never met them or seen them around here.

Mentioning this because I still can't believe it: Right-wingers lost their shit when Michelle Obama wore a dress without sleeves. Melania posed nude and everyone was fine with that.

Close your eyes and think of Alderan.

Smove B. His every word washed over me like a waterfall of champagne, or cognac, or some other expensive beverage. His prose led me like a lover to a bed covered in red satin pillows. His metaphors licked at my ears, and offered me bon bons, and scented candles, and feather caresses.
I heard Barry White music also.

RELEASE THE KILMEADE!

If you were just a tad more inappropriate and insensitive, you'd be a contender for President of the United States.

Racist.

The A. V. Club doesn't care about apathetic people. [Mike Meyers' jaw drops in shock]