I mean, he looks okay I guess, but I wouldn’t call him a grand lizard.

I bet that’s supposed to be Old Black Joe! Apparently Stephen Foster was “inspired” to write Old Black Joe by his father-in-law’s black “servant”...you know, the type of black servant who picked cotton in the 1850's. And for bonus horrorlaughing, let’s hear Bing Fucking Crosby sing it, mourning how his children and…

My guess is nearly anywhere he wants, though I think he’ll have a comparatively longish run with Los Blancos, just because he’s got so much more goodwill than Problematic Fave Mourinho.

Activated charcoal tablets are useful for when you’ve eaten a lot of rich food for a long time and start to feel a little gouty. A lot of my friends are professional bon vivieurs who work in wine or fine dining and during big seasons you gotta give your body a chance to clear out some of that uric acid. Still, that’s…

Also, don’t be the person who has to talk about their sex life all.the.time.

It’s also important to remember not to be a dick about it when your adventurous is someone else’s normal. Locals will give you a chuckled and be pleased when you try something that’s an acquired taste or little off-piste for them as well —the most common example here is dry-roasted grasshoppers— but you’re not going…

Being an adventurous eater means I can do the same in almost any developing country on earth. The flipside is I can’t trust American food anymore. My body made its feelings about hfcs ABUNDANTLY clear on the side of a busy highway in West Texas and through much of the mountain time zone. *shudder*

Do be careful with tacos de burro and birria joints, I know in a lot of places in Mexico, including my city, there is a thriving trade in illicit burro & horse meat. AFAIK there are only four authorized and regulated equine slaughterhouses in Mexico and they’re all in Zacatecas and Aguascaliente. Everything else is…

California is like the reverse Texas: Way more purple than most people believe. San Diego is, IME, just as racist as anywhere else I’ve lived in the South, including in a rural town outside Charlottesville. I first knew Trump was going to get into office when I had to drive the length of California and outside of…

This is the most hilariously bougie thing I’ve seen in ages. Thank you for bringing this joy into my life.

I’m guessing France historically got their taste for avocados via trade with Mexico. Louisiana did a ton of trade with Veracruz through the early 1900's and an avocado filled with shrimp is a very Veracruzana thing. It’s not hard to imagine it going from Veracruz to the French territories to France herself. Also…

plain yogurt (not plain as in vanilla+sugar) is a fine base for a bunch of cold sauces and dips. When I’m giving recipes that require Mexican crema, I’ll often tell folks who don’t have access to it to sub plain yogurt or half plain yogurt and half American sour cream. And of course plain Greek yogurt is great as the…

You could probably achieve some sort of flatness as long as you kept the weight on as it came to room temp after cooking. You wouldn’t get anything close to thinness, though, and the texture would be quite different. If your one concern is even surface exposure, then go ahead, but pressing fowl is a genre unto itself…

A brined butterflied breast would be about on par with an unbrined pounded breast in texture, so if butterflying is easier for you, be sure to brine it as well.

The pussy I know doesn’t mind getting pounded and isn’t afraid to bleed. These guys aren’t that tough.

If the current occupant of the White House is anything to go by, probably getting arrested at klan rallies. For every family loudly decrying their children’s participation, realistically there are a dozen more who don’t consider themselves racist but are happy to talk about how Mexicans are rapists, black people are…

I hope you’re right. I don’t have a lot of faith in people realizing their own delusions, but I hope you’re right.

Exactly. Groups like these aren’t made out of a gang of strong-minded people with a sense of direction. It’s a handful of big personalities and a herd of weak-willed individuals who will only act as part of a crowd, and that veil and protection makes them all the more malicious and dangerous.

but, but, what about all the extra mess you need for the sake of hyperbole and weird posturing over doing incredibly mundane prep work?