You were right. I called her. I told her how I am married now but think about her every day. I asked if she felt the same and all she had to say was THE MOBILE SITE FUCKING SUCKS.

PLEASE INFORM SOMEONE TO TURN OFF THE DAMN AUTOPLAYING VIDEOS

Definitely shows a lack of atttention to detail on the part of the goalkeeper. Clearly, this one isn’t dotting his I’s.

Owing to your first sentence clause, I read your entire story to the tune of Human League’s “Don’t You Want Me,” and then I felt really awkward about that when I got to the end.

That’s because you collapsed from heat exhaustion within sight of the finish line!

Co-sign 100%. Also, what’s the reasoning for removing the top article previews when you hover over sister site headers at the top of the page? That used to drive me to other articles of interest across the entire G/O Media family & now I rarely find myself on any site other than Deadspin & Lifehacker. If they’re all…

OUT INDEFINITELY

war turkey

Great sport. I watched it on The Ocho last week

Having never been touched like that by a woman before, it was all he could do to prematurely eject her.

That dude killed two women and a child and spent an hour running around naked, trying to tackle and wrestle police officers, who absolutely refused to use their service weapons against him, and if watching that video doesn’t tell you 100% the difference between how the police treat black people and white people,…

elderly neighbor, who they claim dumps hundreds of pounds of dog food in her yard every week for the vultures and other wildlife to feed on.

They’re not making a sign with a dead bird, idiot!

His advice: Get a federal permit to kill one of the vultures, then hang it in a tree or other spot where other vultures can see it for miles around.

Can the batter do this if there is a man on first? Because at some point there will be a man on first that doesn’t run when this happens, and there will be a rundown between home and first. Can the runner make it back to home? And continue his at-bat?

There is literally no country on Earth more humble than the US of A

Read the last 11 words a little more carefully. 

+4 stars, if you’re feeling brave...

Finally, a video that belongs on Deadspin.

So, their parents, then.