I admit, I could never make this look this good:

Wow... you're a shitty person.

That's awful, yo.

Agree. Also, if you "comparison shop", you're scum as well. Either stay in or get out. No one has the right waste another person's life, leaving some person haplessly thinking they are in a relationship while the other scouts for someone better. Honestly, it seems very few people actually grow up and never left their…

Cheaters you are all fucking scum.

That they're comparing Iggy's (supposed) sex tape to Bill Cosby drugging and raping multiple women over decades is appalling.

ATTN: "Timber" is the best song of any year ever and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

OH NO, IT'S HAPPENING TO PRINCE HOT GINGE, TOO! Male pattern baldness is cruel.

I mean, maybe, we don't have to completely forget about his butt.

Barnard grad Martha Stewart is absolutely laughing that ass off.

That video with him drinking all that fucking water will never not be funny. Just timeless.

I think he means it in the same way that coming out as gay is just a phase and saying you're a feminist means you just aren't ready to settle down, i.e., he means that "since they don't think exactly how I think they're wrong and just haven't figured it out yet".

Sorry, Stephen. Hollywood only accepts child molesters named Woody or Roman.

That's not a pocket square, silly. That's his heart, and it's on fire for Jesus!

A man's control ended the second he let his jizz fly. Keep it in your balls, pants, sock, tissue, condom, whatever. But once you let it fly, you can fuck off.

Totally.

It's not cheating. Neither is flirting. Or hanging out.

I feel like 95% of Tracy Moore's posts are jokes that are just above my head. Logging in to a hook-up app with the intent to evaluate the fuckability of other potential partners is not the same thing as noticing a good-looking person on the street.