Especially when they have that smashed-face thing going, like he has. He looks like a cranky baby who grew a beard.

More like a chorus that you're compelled to sing along to. Like: song, it's gonna be okay; this sort of open neediness demeans us all.

It might as well be. We also were treated to terms like "festival-core" and "wub wubs" during this here thinkpiece, so who the fuck knows?

"This was actually a meditation on the Teapot Dome scandal of the Harding Administration." - Chad Kroeger

That was you?

And in lieu of that, you'll never go broke underestimating peoples' intelligence.

"Many people said my benchwork that day saved the franchise!"

And not without Sally Fields' daughter.

It's no "Rochelle Rochelle!"
Or "Chunnel!"

Ask your doctor if death is right for you!

Like roast canvasback! Or terrapin!

Well, "I see your face every time we meet," and "But you hurted me, yes you did" are both Dickinson quotes, aren't they?

Poe and Twain being the Godcooluncles, maybe? And William Dean Howells being the one we never talk about or visit anymore?

Major Negative: STAND DOWN!

Don't you mean "iitchy?"

It's the sad-face emoji that really caps off this tone-deaf comment.

Ooh! Lemme try her second-reel Self-realization moment speech in MLP dialect:
"ahhh…ahmmm a hurrible…mrrrknnn boss grrrl…" While looking directly into the eyes of whoever she's saying to, not pausing to close her mouth the once.

If you actually go see this movie, they'll give you a free bowl of soup.

I don't even understand why people watch the actual game of golf on television.

Yup, the ending of the novel was way the fuck off.
And I think the Kubrick film was pretty damn good. Nicholson's scene-chewing actually makes a weird sense when you consider: if you were locked up with it, no chance of escape, it wouldn't be something you could make fun of.
Now that said; the "ballroom full of…