Now this is just Russia being a massive dick.

Some folks will pay good money to hear the words "Amscray!" and "So's your ol' man!" called out in the nasal tones of a pre-war Brooklyn newsboy.

Let me just write that down; "…elderly… pregnant women… being raised for consumption by humans" Thanks!

Sir, you are talking about the distorted woman I love, and she is no tippler!

This is what those of us living outside the US like to call an "Only in America" story.

Spitfires are all very well, but let's hope there are a few more Hurricanes in Dunkirk.

I'd send my regards to Simon the Likeable.

Americans don’t have any interest in watching someone competent run the show.

If you have career longevity like David Bowie, Leonard Cohen or Carrie Fisher, it more or less follows that more people will be affected by the news of your death.

You're lucky.

No, it's just that the train wreck awfulness of 2016 has been its greatest defining characteristic.

In that it's nigh unwatchable?

Shutupshutupshutupshutup

We get so into what may or may not happen after we die that it stops us from trying to make this life and this world better.

C'mon, 2016, work your evil magic. Do this, and I'll never say another bad thing about you, I swear.

And now she's gone too.

Fuck 2016.
Will this year spare anyone with an ounce of creativity?

"Wood Gill Dunting"?

Fuck 2016. I've had it with this year, it's been shit.

The really terrific thing about this is that we don't actually need religions to give us excuses to kill one another; we're already really good at finding any number of other justifications above and beyond the mouldy old sky god of the Bronze Age.