My father was slaughtered by a 15-fingered man.

Big deal. I haven’t killed anyone in Britain in like 20 years.

Aston Martin DBS Kate Moss

I’m sorry $kay, but that is not appropriate footwear. This is the proper footwear for both country and western music...

You’re one of those people who calls the HOA when the neighbor’s yard get’s 1/10th of an inch too long, aren’t you?

It all depends on the specific situation. My car a couple of years ago went and gave up on the timing chain (R32 is a headache) and the dealer service requested an outrageous amount for the “diagnosis” which I had already pinpointed, the parts and swap (in the ballpark of $6.500). I did not have the cash at the time…

There’s a used rubber joke in here somewhere...

Your property, do what you want.

Start wandering around with your fly unzipped. She’ll stop worrying about what phone you have.

You must be safe at parties

Ut oh. The health and safety inspector is in the house.

She’s just happy that Alanis King let her keep her job as a driveway Grid Girl.

Uhh the entire racing series is for our entertainment? That’s literally the reason it exists...

Don’t forget to ban high capacity clouds while you are at it.

YouTube sucks, and it’s quickly becoming not sustainable for much beyond a solo-operated gaming channel where the operator just grinds daily.

“When capitalism inevitably tears the fabric of society apart as we know it”

I came here to throw water on the whole presumption of universal hate for Fallon on SNL, so you *really* fooled me into thinking you were gonna be that person for me.

Instead, you gave a detailed description of the malevolent forces of savvy charm that were *actually* causing him to break so much, and how much everyone…

$10k for a clean XLR???? For the love of God, DO IT! That’s the steal of the century.