You know, I almost rage-typed a hateful response full of obscenities. I took a deep breath and realized that I’m a 30 year old man who hasn’t lived in Philly since I was a teenager and that you’re likely trolling to prove a not-so-nuanced point about awful Philly fans.

NO WAY MAN IT TAKES A SPECIAL PHILLY VIBE TO COAX DELICIOUSNESS FROM SUCH DISSONANT INGREDIENTS AS “MEAT” AND “CHEESE.”

“That toughness comes in handy in a place like North Dakota. You see, up there, jamming your numb fingers against someone’s ice-cold helmet happens every practice. Getting decked on the cement-like dirt is just how a play ends.

I can get a decent cheesesteak at any mall food court in the country. They're not that complicated.

I was at a Bears game over a decade ago. I remember the excitement of seeing the local kid and young star McNabb (because the Bears were, as usual, dogshit). Around the third quarter, I think, McNabb threw a completed pass. Suddenly a guy behind us goes into a full on racist tirade. I turn around and am surprised to…

I didn’t even bother reading the article before commenting.

I’ll just lift up my leg and wipe the rim off with my sock, then go about my business as if nothing happened.

No one could shed blockers, or blood-stained suits, faster than Ray Ray.

You’re not wrong about Ray Lewis. He’s definitely a cut above the rest.

Joe Flacco thinks the Curry 2 Low is a bit flashy.

Why not both?

What John said, also if you want to know the secret to a flat belly, my website has 4 simple foods you shouldn't eat.

thought this was going to be about drugs

Psh. The rarest game in the world is in my head. To even think about it you have to be me.

Sweet chops.

Wow, it's almost like I noticed that while captioning the photo!

Open your eyes sheeple.

I wasn't getting any more action one time, so I threw one in from behind. She wasn't receptive so I had to Decker too.

"Wait, there are passes where you DON'T throw the ball backwards?"
- Matt Flynn