Or Pirates of The Caribbean. “Yo ho, Yo ho. The pirate’s life for me”. And that ride has weaponry (cutlasses and muskets).

Especially after a death. I hated the ones who said this when my Mom died. Wanted to punch them in the face and say, “Yes. Yes, it does.”

Amy Schumer being lusted after is so unbelievable. I prefer my rom-coms to be totally legit, like when Kevin James and Leslie Bibb get together, or Adam Sandler and Kate Beckinsale. You know, a nice out of shape forty-something guy meets a 20-something supermodel who throws herself at him in the final scene.

This is covered in an episode of Louis C. K., where the fat girl points out that the really handsome guys never mind when she flirts with them, but the guys who are themselves fat, or insecure about their looks, feel the need to put a lot of distance between themselves and the fat girl.

He looks like he smells like cigarettes and old spice.

Or show up wearing the same outfit with the same manifesto! Embarrassing!

I’m quitting humanity and going to go become a tree sloth. There’s room in my tree if you want to join.

I was just wondering if they have some sort of Google doc on their little message boards to make sure folks aren't accidentally scheduling for the same day.

Edit: careful how you approach every individual white American male, because you may do something he doesnt agree with and he could shoot you while defending his freedom and beliefs.

“Practice your attitude” = “Women and black people should remember how to speak when talking to their betters.”

This story only starts out like a horror story. It was horrible for me at the time. My boyfriend and I were celebrating our first Thanksgiving together. It was also just a couple years since my Mom died, a loss which had blasted a huge hole in our family. We scattered after that and had Thanksgivings either alone or…

omg

One time my college-age brother, who is bipolar but refuses to be medicated, felt that Thanksgiving was an appropriate time to hold himself hostage with a gun to his head in the back yard, demanding that our dad give him money (more than he already was) to buy drugs. So then the cops came and he was forcibly strapped…

Oh I'm so sorry about your father that is awful!

this comment is like the epitome of you must be fun at parties

I wonder what it’s like for real money to be monopoly money to you. It just must be an entirely different sort of world and thinking.

“That’s because I look just like you, bitch.”

Genius idea: Everybody should get HIV and just let it run its course so we’ll have natural immunity.

Confession: I’ve never actually watched the original of this movie. I had a lot of friends (in high school) that loved this movie. It just always seemed too... I dunno... Donnie Darko for me? In not a good way.