Mom says I can't eat anything with carbon in it.

To be fair, that would indicate Italian food existed on the premises.

I thought it was simply "The Place Where Italian Food Goes To Die"

Guest: I don't eat meat.

This post is Food Babe Science (tm) Approved!

Based on a conversation that I had on facebook today,they believe that these diseases aren't really that bad and that incidents of these diseases were already in the decline when the vaccines were invented. They believe that herd immunity isn't a real thing. They believe that the government is hiding something and…

Ironically, the ideal shape for both "I hate Jesus" and "I love Jesus" cakes is a crucifix.

I cannot stop laughing at the (accurate) concept of the New Testament being the Bible Expansion Pack. The Bible: (A Distinct Lack of) Wrath of the Jew King.

When they released it, the servers were down for DAYS.

When I ws 15, I read in YM that a teaspoon of olive oil is a good conditioner. I thought, "well if a teaspoon is good, a cup (yes, really) will make it GREAT". I tried to rinse it with....more conditioner, and it made it worse (DUH). I took Irish Springs soap and lathered half the bar into my head....still oily. By…

That's true. He cursed the hell out of that fig tree.

The merchant, who was a greatly important merchant of monogrammed mulled wine tankards, was devoured alive by a seemingly never-ending stream of lobsters. Twas a great miracle.

"I'M ALLERGIC TO RED!"

Aaaaah yes, a "clopen" is what I've always heard them called...

In her spare time, the chef from David's story enjoys Russian Roulette, eating glass, and arm-wrestling silverback gorillas during their mating season.

As someone with TMJ, I totally feel your pain.

Dislocated my jaw by yawning.

I yawned my face off.

Interesting to see "religion" and "accomplishing" in the same sentence.

Shut up, Eileen

Oh god, thank you! There are so many otherwise smart people in my life who buy into this shit fully. Our bodies are pretty amazing machines. Why not give it its proper due and believe that it's taking care of the "detoxing" on its own. Also, "detoxing" is dangerous. Don't be stupid. Don't do it.