When NFL fans throw eggs and act unruly it's called passionate. When black people do it they're shot by the cops and it's called "getting what you deserved."

His wife couldn't believe what had gotten into him, but Flacco's decision to "let it all hang out" and throw half a banana on top of his cream of wheat this morning is really paying dividends.

What a fucking douchbag who has blessed America with crappy pizza (Papa John's is just a glorified Little Caesars) and whines about having to provide health care to employees.

Even if I didn't know who that was, I would suspect he was a dickhead at first glance.

Sunny D and 151 will dehydrate you after the first drink then you will experience emotions you have never felt.

When I was sick I one time in college I mixed codeine cough medicine, Dr. Pepper and vodka. It tasted like death. My last memory was me purposely urinating in my kitchen then I woke up in the back of my car with gum in my hair.

Never drink Mad Dog 20/20 that's been sitting in the back window of a car in the Florida sun at Daytona Speedway infield.

Oh sir, the Giants of New York took on the Packers of Green Bay. And in the end, the Giants triumphed by kicking an oblong ball made of pigskin through a big "H". It was a most ripping victory.

Not much man what's raw with you

I'm spamming this link everywhere I can...

I'm a Cardinals fan and I wouldn't be caught dead in that shirt. Mostly because I'm white.

FATHER OF THE YEAR AWARD 2014

This can't be right. Only people whose parents didn't beat them with sticks growing up turn to drugs.

It's more common than you think. Every one of Floyd Mayweather's opponents has punched a dick.

"I'm just a caveman who slipped on some ice thousands of years ago..."

"Your Honor, I think what's being ignored here is the fact that this so-called 'victim' is also partially NOT paralyzed! I move to dismiss the case." —World's worst defense attorney

"Both of the attackers, who are brothers".

And oddly enough, none of them appeared to have brought their black friend to the game